British Comedy Guide

I read the news today oh boy! Page 206

I hate dogs.

Of course it wasn't just the alcohol. It was evil evil dogs. Angry

The dog owners should be punished for raising a psychologically stunted, killer dog. Can't just blame the animal.

I hate people too.

I hate 'the general public'. We're twats.

Quote: Nat Wicks @ August 21 2010, 5:31 PM BST

The dog owners should be punished for raising a psychologically stunted, killer dog. Can't just blame the animal.

Dogs are evil. It's in their nature.

Quote: Aaron @ August 22 2010, 1:23 AM BST

Dogs are evil. It's in their nature.

Meh. It's the owners. My old dog wouldn't hurt a fly. In fact he'd buy it a drink and offer it a bed for the night.

But that's exactly what the owners of dogs who've just eaten a baby say! 'We were really shocked, he's never hurt a fly.'

You can't trust 'em.

You can't trust a cat not to go for someone at some point either, but the point is they can't kill anyone. On account of their ickle mouths and pretty little ladylike teeths. Aw.

Um, humans are capable of it too. And so are cats. I'm sure one could claw and bite a small child to death.

My dog never hurt anyone, don't label the little fella a baby killer! :P

Ok, I shall let your doggie off.
But I really doubt a cat has ever killed anyone. I've never heard of one anyway.

Quote: Leevil @ August 22 2010, 1:28 AM BST

Meh. It's the owners. My old dog wouldn't hurt a fly. In fact he'd buy it a drink laced with rohypnol and offer it a bed for the night.

So your dogs a pervert and a rapist? Not much of an improvement.

But irresponsible dog owners deserve much heavier punishments then they generally recieve.

Quote: zooo @ August 22 2010, 1:37 AM BST

But that's exactly what the owners of dogs who've just eaten a baby say! 'We were really shocked, he's never hurt a fly.'

You can't trust 'em.

You can't trust a cat not to go for someone at some point either, but the point is they can't kill anyone. On account of their ickle mouths and pretty little ladylike teeths. Aw.

Yeh but they're total psychopaths with small animals.

Quote: sootyj @ August 22 2010, 1:43 AM BST

Yeh but they're total psychopaths with small animals.

Pff. Who cares.

I just don't see why dogs have to be so aggressive. See a kitten, eat a kitten. See a baby, bite its face off. They're hardly a threat!

I just Googled for whether a cat had ever killed anyone, and just found a load of stories about how they cuddle up next to babies with fevers to warm them up (and adults). Helping seems to be their natural instinct, rather than chomping.

Dogs can be dangerous weapons, I just don't think all dogs are dangerous weapons. I'm not even a dog/pet fan! I just think people who don't like dogs at all a feckin' weird, cold, emotionless freaks.

Who can resist wanting to fuss over a puppy? Huh?! You dead-inside people!

Quote: zooo @ August 22 2010, 1:37 AM BST

You can't trust a cat not to go for someone at some point either, but the point is they can't kill anyone. On account of their ickle mouths and pretty little ladylike teeths. Aw.

Laughing out loud

Quote: Leevil @ August 22 2010, 1:48 AM BST

Dogs can be dangerous weapons, I just don't think all dogs are dangerous weapons. I'm not even a dog/pet fan! I just think people who don't like dogs at all a feckin' weird, cold, emotionless freaks.

Who can resist wanting to fuss over a puppy? Huh?! You dead-inside people!

I like puppies. They are cute.
It's just big ugly killer dogs that are evil. ;)

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