Quote: sootyj @ August 2 2010, 9:45 PM BSThttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eHPclZ0cNgA
Well here's the fella.
I feel like maybe that wasn't the right link.
Scam Man Page 2
Erm it is I wrote Mrs Columbo it's ironic and funnytand oh shite.
It's actually the freshly bumped "chess" sketch
Quote: sootyj @ August 2 2010, 7:23 PM BSTI like this but it is a bit too vicious. Maybe if he attacked him then pulled the emergency wire and ran off?
Also could do with building up the character of the scammer a bit more.
I've written a few skits in this vein myself...
When the Soot man says too vicious..............
This a little more palatable?
'SCAM MAN'
INT. PUB - DAY
TWO FRIENDS, SAM AND MICK CHAT OVER A PINT.
SAM:
...you're joking; you commute from London to Manchester every day for a temp job? How do you afford that?
MICK:
(CHUCKLING) Don't worry, I've got a little scam going on...
HE TAPS HIS NOSE CONSPIRATORILY.
CUT TO:
INT. TRAIN - DAY
MICK IS APPROACHED BY A CONDUCTOR.
CONDUCTOR:
Tickets, please.
MICK:
Sorry, just give me one second...
HE FUMBLES AWKWARDLY ABOUT HIS POCKETS -
-- PULLS A KNUCKLEDUSTER AND CRACKS THE CONDUCTOR IN THE JAW. MICK THEN SWIFTLY HEFTS THE CONDUCTOR UP AND STUFFS HIM THROUGH A WINDOW, HIS SCREAM FADING QUICKLY INTO THE DISTANCE. FINALLY, OVER THE WAILING OF THE OTHER PASSENGERS, HE STEPS BACK, LIGHTS A MATCH AND SETS HIMSELF ON FIRE, LAUGHING LIKE A MADMAN AS HE'S ENGULFED IN FLAMES.
CUT TO:
INT. PUB - DAY
MICK:
Yep, a nice little scam...
SAM STARES AT MICK, HORRIFIED.
END SKETCH
Better the first bit is maybe a tad awkward. I mean fair evasion doesn't jump out as a scam.
Maybe if he was selling door to door and shat on people's door steps?
Got to admit the first one Made me laugh.
Maybe just go whole hog make it fantasy vilonce like him punching through guys chest and pulling out his heart. Mortal Kombat style. Might make it more palatable for the less sick in the head.
Quote: Badge @ August 2 2010, 10:06 PM BSTThe Buss's decision to axe this sketch rather than rework it just confirms my long held belief that he is the BSG's boy/girl most likely to.
You spoke too soon.
I still think the 'he deludedly thinks it's a scam' gag can work well without recourse to violence.
Quote: Badge @ August 2 2010, 10:06 PM BSTThe Buss's decision to axe this sketch rather than rework it just confirms my long held belief that he is the BSG's boy/girl most likely to. We were BSG once, yes we were. It ain't working as you wanted it so dump it. Amen to that.
Sorry to have let you down, Badge. In many ways I do wish I'd dumped it like I promised but I just had to keep picking that scab.
Quote: sootyj @ August 3 2010, 11:31 AM BSTBetter the first bit is maybe a tad awkward. I mean fair evasion doesn't jump out as a scam.
Maybe if he was selling door to door and shat on people's door steps?
I just realised I could make the a victim of the sketch a parking attendant and no one would bat an eyelid at having him stabbed to death.
Balls.
Quote: Gavin @ August 3 2010, 12:12 PM BSTGot to admit the first one Made me laugh.
Maybe just go whole hog make it fantasy vilonce like him punching through guys chest and pulling out his heart. Mortal Kombat style. Might make it more palatable for the less sick in the head.
That's a nice idea, Gavin. Well, perhaps not nice...
Quote: JohnnyD @ August 3 2010, 12:35 PM BSTYou spoke too soon.
I still think the 'he deludedly thinks it's a scam' gag can work well without recourse to violence.
But surely violence is the answer?
How is this going to be a runner? Unless he actually runs away from the crime scene.
Quote: Leevil @ August 3 2010, 2:08 PM BSTHow is this going to be a runner? Unless he actually runs away from the crime scene.
I was thinking he'd appear in a series of sketches where he'd reveal more crafty money saving tips that involved horrible phyical retribution.
Maybe you should spoof that Dom fella?
He could be mistaken for a Eastend hardcase and that's how he gets his money saving deals?
Quote: Leevil @ August 3 2010, 2:37 PM BSTMaybe you should spoof that Dom fella?
He could be mistaken for a Eastend hardcase and that's how he gets his money saving deals?
Not familiar with that picture. Who is the guy?
Dom Littlewood (I think). He presents shows on BBC1 on how to get the best deals and stuff like that.
Oh, here's John Culshaw doing an impression - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bFtp_xjGZUw