A ROOM FULL OF UNATTRACTIVE FEMINISTS OBVIOUSLY AT THE END OF A RATHER GRIM CONFERENCE ARE STANDING GLOWERING AT A DJ WHO IS ABOUT TO SPIN HIS DECKS.
SIGNS ON THE WALL READ "No it isn't funny," " All jokes are rape" AND "Wimmin don't do slimmin'"
THE DJ REACHES FOR HIS RECORD A MAN RUNS UP AND STOPS HIM
FEMINIST1
If he plays something I'm going to chop his cock off.
FEMINIST2
Whoopee as vegetarian wimmin we'll be able to eat it.
MAN
Woe careful there dude. You were about to play Smack my bitch up.
DJ
I know.
MAN
Don't think you should play something more feminist like It ain't me Babe? or Independent Women?
DJ
No.
MAN
But why? These feminists won't pay, hell they may even kill you?
DJ
I know...(starts to cry) it's what I'm meant to do it's my whole story, I exist to get a cheap laugh and then and then (now sobbing) it's what God wants of me.
MAN
God isn't a hack comedy writer.
DJ
Maybe he is.
MAN
But then what am I? I'm not part of a sketch. I prove you can be your own person.
DJ
Have you checked your ID?
MAN OPENS HIS WALLET HE PULLS OUT HIS BUS PASS IT READS
"Random ironic man."
HE FLIPS ALL THROUGH HIS ID IT ALL SAYS THE SAME THING.
DJ PUTS ON SOME AWFUL SEXIST BIT OF RAP ABOUT HOES OR SIMILAR CRAP
FEMINISTS DESCEND ON THE STAGE AND REND THE DJ LIMB FROM LIMB
MAN
I'm just an ironic punchline?
A WHITE LIGHT DESCENDS DESTROYING THE ENTIRE SCENE
MAN (just before his destruction)
It's all so beautiful.
SCENE2
SOOTYJ IS FINISHING TYPING THE SKETCH WE'VE JUST SCENE
SOOTYJ
Well that was a load of crap why do I bother? Ah the post.
HE OPENS A LETTER ADRESSED TO "Ironic self referential comedy character."
SOOTYJ
I don't care if they sue me. I won't rebuild that 4th wall I didn't mean to smash it,
