MILES
Fifa have been criticised for bossing South Africa around during the world cup. More heavily than Mel Gibson with a Jewish accountant.
BLATTER
This is nonsense. We just like a well organised world cup.
MILES
But what about your treatment of Nelson Mandela? He maybe 92 but he's one of the world's most beloved elder statesmen. You've made him work harder than a Soweto home for retired prostitutes when Rooney's in town.
BLATTER
We just made every effort to ensure he would be able to attend the final match, the award presentation, the interview with Hello magazine. So we set up some special accomadation for him...
MILES
On Robin Island.
BLATTER
But everyone wants a well organised, safe crime free world cup. The South African police seemed very experienced at dealing with people without FIFA licenses to sell merchandise or tickets.
MILES
Predominantly black South Africans? Being forced to move on for not having the correct paperwork must remind them of the good old days,
BLATTER
Yes some of the police were getting quite nostalgic.
MILES
Do you see keeping order still being a problem in the next world cup? How about holding it in Zimbabwe, they seem to appreciate how FIFA likes to do things.
BLATTER
No way.
MILES
Too opressive?
BLATTER
Too few football stadiums. We're hammering out a deal with North Korea.
