Status report Page 2,423

Quote: EllieJP @ July 7 2010, 11:03 AM BST

2 bed hopefully. And yes, I know. Holiday was needed though!

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If I Put a vehicle before my wife, I would be living in it!

Ellie JP, Ellie JP
Has got herself into a mess, so I see
Eighteen days left with a roof overhead
Couldn't go house hunting, or so she said
Due to a longstanding plan she was havin' a..
Well deserved rest in the old town of Havana
Watching the days tick away while she holidayed
Coming home sun tanned but more than a bit dismayed
Out on the hunt for a suitable property
One with two bedrooms would do very nice-ly
Finding a house she described as 'just great'
Settled her fears, now she just couldn't wait
To move in with boyfriend on whom she depended
But wait! He had news that completely upended..
Her dreams, as declared 'I can't agree yet'
I'm sorry my dear but my bike will get wet.

Quote: EllieJP @ July 7 2010, 9:29 AM BST

and getting into the dangerous zone when someone wouldn't take a great house because his motor bike might get wet.

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Couldn't he have built it a litle bike roof/shed/thing? Or bought one of those covers I see on bikes all the time.

Quote: Will Cam @ July 7 2010, 12:34 PM BST

If I Put a vehicle before my wife, I would be living in it!

Ellie JP, Ellie JP
Has got herself into a mess, so I see
Eighteen days left with a roof overhead
Couldn't go house hunting, or so she said
Due to a longstanding plan she was havin' a..
Well deserved rest in the old town of Havana
Watching the days tick away while she holidayed
Coming home sun tanned but more than a bit dismayed
Out on the hunt for a suitable property
One with two bedrooms would do very nice-ly
Finding a house she described as 'just great'
Settled her fears, now she just couldn't wait
To move in with boyfriend on whom she depended
But wait! He had news that completely upended..
Her dreams, as declared 'I can't agree yet'
I'm sorry my dear but my bike will get wet.

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That's amazing.

And it's not my boyfriend who's having the fits about his bike. It's our other housemate.

What a silly bugger.

Dump him! Just move in with your boyfriend!

Quote: zooo @ July 7 2010, 1:01 PM BST

What a silly bugger.

Dump him! Just move in with your boyfriend!

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But he's he inhouse spare for when her boyfriend is drained of all fluid.

Quote: Matthew Stott @ July 7 2010, 1:02 PM BST

But he's he inhouse spare for when her boyfriend is drained of all fluid.

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Bloody hell, you're in a horny mood today! Knife wounds, fluids. Whatever next.

Chip's struggling to think of things to say to a pregnant woman.

"Is it a pain having that in front of you?"
"Do people touch your big belly all the time?"
"Any strange cravings?"
"When's it due?"

I'm counting the seconds until somebody comes back to the office and saves me from more awkward preggo talk.

You absolutely sure she's preggie and you're not about to do that great male trick of mentioning her pregnancy when she's in fact just fat?

She's as pregnant as it's possible for a human woman to be.

Very confused about my book, being in spain doesn't help, Im told it has been released to certain retailers now in order to be there when the Daily Mail thing runs.

People have told me that they have had emails from Amazon saying it has shipped but Waterstones and Tesco's are still saying the 26th July.

Quote: chipolata @ July 7 2010, 1:28 PM BST

She's as pregnant as it's possible for a human woman to be.

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She's probably sick to bloody death of being asked about it. Throw a real curve ball in by asking her out for a drink.

You could try asking if her belly button has turned inside out yet.

Or whether she's ready to be torn in two like a flesh crisp packet.

Quote: bigfella @ July 7 2010, 1:47 PM BST

Very confused about my book, being in spain doesn't help, Im told it has been released to certain retailers now in order to be there when the Daily Mail thing runs.

People have told me that they have had emails from Amazon saying it has shipped but Waterstones and Tesco's are still saying the 26th July.

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That's not good if people haven't got set dates. Hmmm.

Quote: bigfella @ July 7 2010, 1:47 PM BST

Very confused about my book, being in spain doesn't help, Im told it has been released to certain retailers now in order to be there when the Daily Mail thing runs.

People have told me that they have had emails from Amazon saying it has shipped but Waterstones and Tesco's are still saying the 26th July.

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BF, remind me of the title. I'll have a look next time I'm out at the book shops in central London.

Quote: Matthew Stott @ July 7 2010, 1:53 PM BST

Or whether she's ready to be torn in two like a flesh crisp packet.

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Ooh, such violent imagary!