I tried to tell a joke once and I got its ending muddled up with another joke and it didn't make sense. Since then I've always thought twice about trying.
Can you tell jokes? Page 2
Quote: Alfred J Kipper @ April 9 2010, 5:33 PM BSTI tried to tell a joke once and I got its ending muddled up with another joke and it didn't make sense. Since then I've always thought twice about trying.
Just twice?
Quote: Ben @ April 9 2010, 11:14 AM BSTI see myself as more of a quipper, but, unfortunately, there's no money in quipping. No matter how hard you quip.
Quipper- the dolphin with a line in glib one liners
I'm not too bad in the old joke telling depo, but I'd much rather steal other peoples than go to the bother of writing my own.
Apparently there's some law stopping me making money out of that though...
Quote: Sorrel @ April 22 2010, 11:47 AM BSTI'm not too bad in the old joke telling depo, but I'd much rather steal other peoples than go to the bother of writing my own.
Apparently there's some law stopping me making money out of that though...
Hasn't stopped Joe Pasquale.
does a bear shit in the woods ? yes joke telling its an art your born with it the is a joke bank in the cerebal vortex in your head , people are now considering personality transplants in america , only america hey , the humour part of the brain gets stimulas from lager a doctor friend told me , and also we develop a sense of humour living in the u.k , people tell me when I go abroad , joke tellings easy pick a subject and turn it on its head take sex for example men and womens indifference is obvious , jokes about arseholes , vaginas , tits cocks its easy , if fannys could talk they would argue with women about not wanting sex the pussy whipping thing , ie women would really start to understnd men properly , and the same for cocks imagine a cock talking , I mean minds got a mind of its own anyway , penis envy thing going on there , imagine the men and women not even taking part I suppose you,d have to let them get on with it the arguments I mean ,
anyhow ther you go have I thrown any light on it for you , go on have a go ,
pick a subject like cloning or something you know mad crazy scientists or something.
...?
Sorry, I didn't catch that.
I don't know whether it's just me but I always feel uncomfortable when someone starts telling a "joke" in a pub or whatever. You know the type of thing -
"Oh listen to this, you'll love this, there was this black bloke in bed with a raccoon, right...no, hold on, there was this black raccoon in bed with a...f**k, hold on I'll just ask Sarah, she knows it...Sarah? Sarah what was that joke about the raccoon and the black bloke? Oh it was a badger!!" etc etc.
The problem is that in such an intimate setting - maybe three or four people around a table - you always feel pressured to laugh, despite the fact that the joke was god-awful and the delivery was worse. So there's an atmosphere of falseness straight away.
To answer the question I can't tell traditional jokes. I'd feel such a twat even trying. Telling "story" jokes is a form of narcissism that should be for the stage only IMHO. After all you're saying to your peers "Shut up, look at meee! I'm funneeee! I'm funnier than you! Shut up! Meeee!".
But then I suppose that's what anyone who's trying to get into comedy is doing on some level. So perhaps I'm talking shite.
I do hate pub comedians though.
Quote: Lee Henman @ May 9 2010, 3:11 AM BSTI don't know whether it's just me but I always feel uncomfortable when someone starts telling a "joke" in a pub or whatever. You know the type of thing -
"Oh listen to this, you'll love this, there was this black bloke in bed with a raccoon, right...no, hold on, there was this black raccoon in bed with a...f**k, hold on I'll just ask Sarah, she knows it...Sarah? Sarah what was that joke about the raccoon and the black bloke? Oh it was a badger!!" etc etc.
I forget the next bit but I seem to remember the punchline goes "Well, they're all in it together, aint they?!"
Quote: David Bussell @ May 9 2010, 10:48 AM BSTI forget the next bit but I seem to remember the punchline goes "Well, they're all in it together, aint they?!"
Yeah I think a cabbie told me it. 
There's a clip from Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip which pretty much sums up my joke telling ability
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b9Rst83JCz8
Ahh well, I suppose a quick wit is much better than the ability to tell jokes. Though, my wit is less quick and relies more on l'esprit d'escalier which I believe is french for "oh bollocks, that's what I should have said"