What's the Funniest Way to Kill a Cat? Page 2

Quote: Oldrocker @ April 24 2010, 11:28 PM BST

Allow me to help.

No, it's not.

And if you are going to apologise for your grammar, at least learn to spell it.

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Yeah, I'm not particularly interested in misery guts flame attempts in one of my threads. ok? Cheers.

Quote: sootyj @ April 24 2010, 11:34 PM BST

Hmm you guys really can't do this stuff without me.

1 Cat litter tray filled with cement.
2 Over spring loaded cat flap decapitates cat.
3 Cat sticks it's head through slot in DVD tray, decapitated when it closes to fast.
4 Cat litter tray filled with quick sand.
5 Man drives by in a Lamborghini cat flys into it and is splattered (it's a literal pussy magnet).
6 Cat jumps on trampoline and flys into next door's shelter for hungry pit bulls.
7 Gets it's bottom taped up and explodes taking a shit.
8 Hunted by an undaventurous hunter who substitutes it for a tiger.
9 Vet picks up the cat and you ask them to put him down.
10 Your hit man chum is by the door and you ask them to take take the cat out.

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I particularly liked 3 and 7.

Quote: sootyj @ April 24 2010, 4:17 PM BST

Smugged to death by Bussell?

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Ha!

Quote: sootyj @ April 24 2010, 11:34 PM BST

Hmm you guys really can't do this stuff without me.

1 Cat litter tray filled with cement.
2 Over spring loaded cat flap decapitates cat.
3 Cat sticks it's head through slot in DVD tray, decapitated when it closes to fast.
4 Cat litter tray filled with quick sand.
5 Man drives by in a Lamborghini cat flys into it and is splattered (it's a literal pussy magnet).
6 Cat jumps on trampoline and flys into next door's shelter for hungry pit bulls.
7 Gets it's bottom taped up and explodes taking a shit.
8 Hunted by an undaventurous hunter who substitutes it for a tiger.
9 Vet picks up the cat and you ask them to put him down.
10 Your hit man chum is by the door and you ask them to take take the cat out.

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There's my man!

A friend of mine used to have a cat back in the old VHS days. He had one of those players with a spring-loaded tray that popped up at the top and used to delight in waiting for the cat to curl up asleep on it before pushing the eject button on his wired controller.

Quote: David Bussell @ April 25 2010, 9:39 AM BST

Ha!

There's my man!

A friend of mine used to have a cat back in the old VHS days. He had one of those players with a spring-loaded tray that popped up at the top and used to delight in waiting for the cat to curl up asleep on it before pushing the eject button on his wired controller.

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Wow just enough detail for me to picture every detail of the scene and be amused by it.

Were you drinking Cresta and enjoying Aztec bars before watching Battle Beyond the Stars?

Quote: sootyj @ April 25 2010, 9:44 AM BST

Wow just enough detail for me to picture every detail of the scene and be amused by it.

Were you drinking Cresta and enjoying Aztec bars before watching Battle Beyond the Stars?

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That's uncanny! We were watching a dodgy pirate of The Terminator. I remember because my friend's mum, who insisted on wandering in from time to time, wasn't to know we were watching an 18 Certificate film so we lied to her saying we were watching - you guessed it - Battle Beyond the Stars!

What we were drinking was lost to the mists of time...

Aah fuzzy old VHS pirates. I remember our 6th form common room, Terminators, Lethal Weapon and of course Iron Eagle II (the good one).

We'd have spoddy younger kids clustered sround our entrance trying to get some of the action. Then being told off by prefects for being to young to enter.