British Comedy Guide

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Can someone get me one of these please?

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http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/asia-pacific/8627335.stm

:P

:O Laughing out loud

:D

Quote: billwill @ April 12 2010, 7:15 PM BST

To liven up this thread a bit.

Jokes from CiX
================

What if people treated cars like computers?

General Motors doesn't have a help line for people who don't knowhow to
drive, because people don't treat cars like they do computers. But,
imagine if they did....

HelpLine: "General Motors HelpLine, how can I help you?"
Customer: "I got in my car and closed the door and nothing happened!"
HelpLine: "Did you put the key in the ignition slot and turn it?"
Customer: "What's an ignition?"
HelpLine: "It's a starter motor that draws current from your battery and
turns over the engine."
Customer: "Ignition? Motor? Battery? Engine? How come I have to know all
these technical terms just to use my car?"

HelpLine: "General Motors HelpLine, how can I help you?"
Customer: "My car ran fine for a week and now it won't go anywhere!"
HelpLine: "Is the gas tank empty?"
Customer: "Huh? How do I know?"
HelpLine: "There's a little gauge on the front panel with a needle and
markings from 'E' to 'F'. Where is the needle pointing?"
Customer: "It's pointing to 'E'. What does that mean?"
HelpLine: "It means you have to visit a gasoline vendor and purchase some
more gasoline. You can install it yourself or pay the vendor to install it
for you."
Customer: "What? I paid $12,000 for this car! Now you tell me that I have
to keep buying more components? I want a car that comes with everything
built in!"

HelpLine: "General Motors HelpLine, how can I help you?"
Customer: "Your cars suck!"
HelpLine: "What's wrong?"
Customer: "It crashed, that's what wrong!"
HelpLine: "What were you doing?"
Customer: "I wanted it to run faster, so I pushed the accelerator pedal
all the way to the floor. It worked for a while and then it crashed and it
won't start now!"
HelpLine: "It's your responsibility if you misuse the product.What do you
expect us to do about it?"
Customer: "I want you to send me the latest version that doesn't crash any
more!"

HelpLine: "General Motors HelpLine, how can I help you?"
Customer: "Hi, I just bought my first car, and I chose your car because it
has automatic transmission, cruise control, power steering, power brakes,
and power door locks."
HelpLine: "Thanks for buying our car. How can I help you?"
Customer: "How do I work it?"
HelpLine: "Do you know how to drive?"
Customer: "Do I know how to what?"
HelpLine: "Do you know how to drive?"
Customer: "I'm not a technical person. I just want to go places
in my car!"

Nicely put in perspective Bill!

Quote: zooo @ April 17 2010, 11:35 PM BST

Can someone get me one of these please?

Image

What is it?

Binatone thingy! Plays Pong.

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Quote: zooo @ April 18 2010, 9:56 PM BST

Binatone thingy! Plays Pong.

Image

I got a unit which plugs into the TV which has 5 basic games.

I heart retro games.
I have some '80s ones!

eBay?

Yep, had a look, not too expensive! I mean it is a crap game obviously, but retro stuff is usually lots of moneys.

I have one.

I've got something like this somewhere. I'm not sure if it has Pong on it though.

http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/SUPER-JOY-TV-plug-in-games-console-76-retro-games-new_W0QQitemZ310214344463QQcmdZViewItemQQptZUK_Toys_VintageToys_RL?hash=item483a373f0f#ht_5417wt_945

Quote: zooo @ April 18 2010, 10:22 PM BST

Yep, had a look, not too expensive! I mean it is a crap game obviously, but retro stuff is usually lots of moneys.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s2E9iSQfGdg&feature=related

video of worlds second oldest computer game

Quote: zooo @ April 18 2010, 9:56 PM BST

Binatone thingy! Plays Pong.

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Ooo, I've got an original Pong game from about 1977 in my cupboard in the bedroom, I wonder if it sill works.

It's not a COMPUTER game you understand. It pre-dates any significant home-micro-computers and is basically one chip with lots of analogue computer type circuitry, i.e amplifiers and comparators.

The output was a TV signal, not a computer monitor signal (though there are similarities of course between those two).

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