British Comedy Guide

Any one fancy joining a tribe? Page 6

Quote: DaButt @ March 20 2010, 11:44 PM GMT

Guns don't scare me any more than steak knives or baseball bats do.

I am fast enough to outrun about 90% of people on the planet, so I would be less terrified of facing an aggressor armed with a baseball bat or a steak knife, rather than facing an aggressor with a gun. I hate guns. So noisy (although silencers are good). I was given my first gun, just an air rifle, at age 7 and taught how to shoot accurately. Then I progressed to a .22 rifle, a shotgun and finally a .222 rifle, by which time I soon grew sick of shooting animals for sport. If someone wants to commit a murder, suicide or armed robbery, they can no doubt do it without a gun, but having a gun makes it that much easier. I'm all for soldiers and police having guns, but don't like the idea of suburban civilians being able to buy guns.

Quote: Kenneth @ March 21 2010, 2:51 AM GMT

Not for a while. It would likely require ethnic wars - or an invasion resulting in an oppressive occupation and food shortages - to prompt a popular return to cannibalism. Cannibalism is seen as pretty backward in that part of the world theseadays, but some Dayaks of Indonesian Borneo in 1997 reverted to ritual cannibalisation of Indonesian migrants who had been taking over their land and forests.

Surely a bunch of internet wankers classes as an invasion?

Quote: sootyj @ March 21 2010, 8:29 AM GMT

Surely a bunch of internet wankers classes as an invasion?

Speaking as a professional internet wanker myself, people tend to tolerate tourist invasions, provided everyone gets a share of the money and the sacred sites aren't demolished to make way for golf courses.

Quote: Kenneth @ March 21 2010, 9:49 AM GMT

Speaking as a professional internet wanker myself, people tend to tolerate tourist invasions, provided everyone gets a share of the money and the sacred sites aren't demolished to make way for golf courses.

There are worse things than golf courses. Like poor people.

Quote: Kenneth @ March 21 2010, 3:14 AM GMT

I am fast enough to outrun about 90% of people on the planet, so I would be less terrified of facing an aggressor armed with a baseball bat or a steak knife, rather than facing an aggressor with a gun. I hate guns. So noisy (although silencers are good). I was given my first gun, just an air rifle, at age 7 and taught how to shoot accurately. Then I progressed to a .22 rifle, a shotgun and finally a .222 rifle, by which time I soon grew sick of shooting animals for sport.

You aren't fast enough to outrun a thrown knife or a swung bat. I've never shot an animal for sport, so mere ownership of a firearm isn't a one-way ticket to "meat is murder."

I'm currently hosting a bunch of hardcore lefties and they don't seem to care at all that I have a firearm in the house.

Quote: DaButt @ March 21 2010, 10:54 AM GMT

You aren't fast enough to outrun a thrown knife or a swung bat.

They'd have to be Ganesh to do as much damage as a loony with one gun.

Quote: DaButt @ March 21 2010, 10:54 AM GMT

You aren't fast enough to outrun a thrown knife or a swung bat.

You haven't seen me run! If someone picks up a baseball bat and starts swinging it at me, I can outrun them. If someone picks up a steak knife and makes to throw it, I can start running and have a good chance of dodging the thrown knife. Whereas if someone picks up a gun and starts shooting at me, I am much more likely to be killed as I cannot outrun bullets. Hence if there were three people approaching me, one armed with a gun, one with a bat and one with a knife, it's the gun that would scare me the most.

Quote: DaButt @ March 21 2010, 10:54 AM GMT

I've never shot an animal for sport, so mere ownership of a firearm isn't a one-way ticket to "meat is murder."

As Stan's uncle Jimbo says in South Park: "It was comin' right for us!" Sure, some gun owners never shoot animals, just targets. Some animals are shot to put them out of their misery if seriously injured, and others (such as snakes or wild dogs/pigs) may be shot in self-defence. But in Australia, most of the gun owners I know simply get a thrill out of shooting animals. They are generally culling introduced species (foxes, rabbits, feral cats, etc), or culling kangaroos in plague proportions and (sometimes) using the carcasses as dog food and the skins for fur/tanning. Yet they still regard the shooting of these animals as a pleasurable (albeit non-competitive) sport. I can't stand the noise of the gunshots and the stench of fresh blood. Duck season opened yesterday and I hate seeing ducks get shot.

Quote: DaButt @ March 21 2010, 10:54 AM GMT

I'm currently hosting a bunch of hardcore lefties and they don't seem to care at all that I have a firearm in the house.

That's because you're a nice military (ex-military?) guy and not a psycho. Is it a requirement under US law that guns in the house be stored in a locked cabinet or safe or drawer, with ammunition stored separately? Or are there different laws for each state?

Quote: Kenneth @ March 21 2010, 2:59 PM GMT

That's because you're a nice military (ex-military?) guy and not a psycho.

Ex. But that was 20 years ago.

Is it a requirement under US law that guns in the house be stored in a locked cabinet or safe or drawer, with ammunition stored separately? Or are there different laws for each state?

I've never heard of such a law. Some states may have laws about using trigger locks, but I don't know if there are any places that require ammo to be stored separately. It all comes down to common sense: keep the firearms out of reach if there are small children about.

The people I know who have kids and guns have trained their children not to touch them. It's done at an early age and seems to work well.

Quote: DaButt @ March 21 2010, 4:25 PM GMT

Ex. But that was 20 years ago.

Which one?

Quote: DaButt @ March 21 2010, 4:25 PM GMT

Ex. But that was 20 years ago.

Coincidentally (or irrelevantly), perusing last Friday's paper over breakfast a few minutes ago, I read an article from The Times stating the US Army has scrapped bayonet drills:

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/us_and_americas/article7066220.ece

Quote: DaButt @ March 21 2010, 4:25 PM GMT

I've never heard of such a law. Some states may have laws about using trigger locks, but I don't know if there are any places that require ammo to be stored separately.

When I came back to Australia a couple of years ago there was a new nationwide gun law, banning semi-automatic rifles and requiring that guns be stored in locked metal safes bolted to the wall/floor, with ammunition stored separately also in safes. This law (enacted separately by each state) was introduced after a psychopath in Tasmania shot dead 35 people. Gun deaths (most of which are suicides in Australia) have subsequently declined.

Oops, I just looked up data on gun deaths in Oz and it seems "knives and blunt instruments" are used in more murders than guns here. Which means I should be more scared of knives and bats than guns, but I'm not.

Image

Till DaButt gets DaBullets

Quote: Kenneth @ March 21 2010, 9:16 PM GMT

Coincidentally (or irrelevantly), perusing last Friday's paper over breakfast a few minutes ago, I read an article from The Times stating the US Army has scrapped bayonet drills

Those were the most exhausting exercises we did during basic training. I wish they'd scrapped them 25 years ago.

Butt stroke to the head! Move!
Butt stroke to the groin! Move.
Butt stroke to the kidney! Move!

Lots of stabby motions, too.

Oops, I just looked up data on gun deaths in Oz and it seems "knives and blunt instruments" are used in more murders than guns here.

Where there's a will there's a way. People in Africa are very good at massacring their neighbors with machetes and garden hoes.

Fancy Joining a Tribe?
Not after watchin Apocolypto.
I wouldn't know which Frog to use for the poison darts.

Quote: Steve Sunshine @ March 21 2010, 9:58 PM GMT

I wouldn't know which Frog to use for the poison darts.

Always choose the brightly coloured ones.

Quote: DaButt @ March 21 2010, 9:59 PM GMT

Always choose the brightly coloured ones.

:D

Sounds like good advice, unless you're trying to work out which Mushroom you can eat .
It's a Mayan Field out there
:D

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