Hi...
I just read this. Genuinely it was very good. It's not very often I've read a script extract on here that was as entertaining... particularly;
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SPEEDED UP FOOTAGE OF DAN SMOKING AND DRINKING COFFEE - COFFEE CUPS MULTIPLE AROUND HIM AND THE ASHTRAY OVERFLOWS.
DAN (VOICEOVER)
...and drink coffee and smoke and drink coffee and smoke, and look out of the window at all the other twats like me.
DAN LOOKS OUT OF THE WINDOW
OUT OF THE WINDOW WE CAN SEE OTHER YOUNG MEN DRESSED ONLY IN DRESSING GOWNS IN THEIR BACK GARDENS.
ONE MAN IS STANDING PERFECTLY STILL WITH A CIGARETTE IN HIS HAND, HIS CHIN LIFTED SLIGHTLY TOWARD THE SKY AND HIS EYES CLOSED. HE IS ANKLE DEEP IN A MOUND OF CIGARETTE BUTTS.
ONE MAN IS TRYING TO HANG UP WET CLOTHES ON THE WASHING LINE. HE DOESN'T HAVE ANY PEGS SO HE IS STRUGGLING TO SELLOTAPE THE CLOTHES TO THE LINE.
DAN (VOICEOVER)
I'm just another impotent, stinking, twat-healing, hopelessly under-
achieving, slovenly, disgusting, filth-magnet c**t.
ACROSS THE ROAD, ANOTHER YOUNG MAN IN A DRESSING GOWN RUNS OUT OF HIS BACK DOOR AND FALLS TO HIS KNEES IN THE BACK GARDEN.
YOUNG MAN
[Screaming, mournfully]
Oh God! I'm awake!
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I laughed out loud at some parts there.
Go for it