Some John Terry stuff I did'nt use.
What have Vanessa Perroncei and Cheryl Cole got in common?
They both have had swollen lips.
What does John Terry use when he wants sex with a woman?
One of his mates.
John Terry is sat on the team bus after a game,crying, sobbing, muttering and
things no one can understand.Joe Cole leans over to Frank Lampard
"Have you heard JT?"
"Yeah what's happening?"
"Talking bollocks."
" Jez, talking bollocks those he really does'nt need."
Newspaper reports list the length of John Terry's infidelities as between 4 and 8 inches.
John Terry says he has been put off wanting sex forever,after Cheryl Cole set him up on a blind date with the ginger one from Girls Aloud.
John Terry's been asked to front a new television programme about sex and football,its called Snatch of the Day.
When asked if he could remember the names of all the women he's slept with John Terry replied "easier done than said."
Vanessa Perroncei said John Terry treated their affair like a secret military operation,and she knew it was over when he told her to abort.
Ever wonder why John Terry is always moaning on a football pitch?
Its all that listening to the women he's slept with.