Quote: sootyj @ December 22 2009, 5:16 PM GMTGodot made me LOL as ever the hilarious bastard. The bastard child of Dennis Norden and Dennis Nilsen.
The Life and Times of Jeremy Spicer Page 10
Compared to 'Back to Class...", this was a great disappointment.
It's a shame that we are publicly seeing the mental collapse of one lovely, cuddly young man; he obviously needs help. At his tender age he should be taking criticism on board instead of criticising criticism, as it were. It's plain to see by his detailed dissection of each criticism that he is utterly ego-driven. There's nothing wrong with having a large ego (mine is massive when aroused) but James' ego is blinding him. The trouble is, Lord Cotterbot is like someone drowning at sea - but when thrown a lifebelt, he tosses it back, 'skweeming', "I don't like the colour!" This type of behaviour is probably the result of a failed relationship or rejection of some kind brought about by, say, sexual or artistic impotency - or both.
'Godot Taxis' put it brilliantly when he said, "It felt a bit like a training video for the Samaritans - the real life ramblings of a bloke before he retired to his shed to drink weed killer." I couldn't agree more. In fact, if 'The Life and Times of Jeremy Spicer' went down the Samaritans/suicide black comedy route, it may be worth pursuing.
I watched this again, this time while I wasn't wrapping presents. It is actually a lot better than back to class. I think the bits to camera were far too brent like and the bit where he takes calls were too like Partridge but some of the moments while he was taking calls were actually quite original.
There were two moments however which I think were brilliant (though in truth this only totalled about fifteen seconds of the programme) I like him telling people to stop calling and for some reason I laughed at him poitning out angrily that Jeremy Paxman had a swivel chair. I also love the fact you have included moments of seriounesses in the script.
I understand where you are coming from when you say you are writing subtle comedy and you might be wary that people who criticised your work do not like this sub genre so might not be worthy critiquers. However I love subtle dramatic comedy and I think you need to put more subtle jokes in it as like gavin and stacey you seem to be using realism as an excuse for not being funny. By jokes I don't mean gags just nice subtle comments and moments like the two I have just mentioned.
I really do like your performance and think you have a bit of an odd persoanlity (hopefully this doesn't offend you but you are a little bit of a tit) which comes through and so makes you a really strong performer.
I might email you a script in the new year as I have an idea of basing a character on a guy I knew from uni who reminds me quite a lot like you in both personality and looks.
I do agree with Ronnie, and Marc P, David Bussell & a few others.
The performance & production is good enough.
But if you're deliberately not looking for something laugh out loud funny, then were plenty more opportunities to put in some funnier dialogue, or to give us a better idea of what the character was about..
The framework was all there, it just needed to be tighter & sharper with a bit more to engage the audience, whether that be comedy or not.
I'd be more interested to see you stretch yourself a bit though.
There were a couple of times when I felt like I might be just watching a Cottercast.
The good thing is that you seem quite comfortable in front or the Camera, and have an engaging manner.
As regards the criticism, I'd suggest that you either ignore it, or try to take it on board. Not everyones going to have the same sense of humour, but once you put something in front of an audience such as this you will get a fair guide on whether it's any good or not.
You will improve James, but I think that you may do it faster if you become a little bit more self critical rather *than* being self congratulatory.
Or at least seeming that way in any case.
I don't believe you can resist the things that make no sense.
I am really sorry for being a bit of a twat in regards to my massively inflated ego. Most of you are right I am far too confident and need to add more comedy into my work. I am also sorry about not taking the criticism onboard. One of my major downfalls apart from a lack of comedy from a comedian is I don't like criticism especially if it's right. Some of you would know in the past that I can respond to criticism in a funny and occasionally witty way (very rarely but go with me on this) when the criticisms are absurd and not real but when I know what you mean I have this very bad tendency especially in this industry to get very defensive. The thing is I spent a lot of time working on ideas, characters, filming and editing and when someone just comes along as says they don't like it hurts a bit because of the time and effort you put into a project. I think the thing I am learning is that I need work with other people, so they can script edit and even in some cases write me some material. I can act quite well as characters especially ones I have played in the past which bare some resemblance to myself. I also know I need to spend a hell of a lot more time working on a script. Because I am self-taught writer and actor I like to do things my way which is spend a lot of time working on really detailed back-story but when it comes to the day of shooting I end up making a lot of it up which is a skill itself but one that needs to be honed. Anyway I am sorry for going off the handle and as I regularly say on here, I appreciate the feedback, keep it coming.
James ask peoples opinions earlier in my opinion.
Quote: sootyj @ December 27 2009, 10:22 PM GMTJames ask peoples opinions earlier in my opinion.
I think I will in future.
You can but learn, James. You're young, so have plenty of time.
Quote: Ben @ December 27 2009, 10:34 PM GMTYou can but learn, James. You're young, so have plenty of time.
That is true but I am eager to learn quickly and make good comedy.
Even though you prefer longer pieces, I think in the meantime you'd benefit from doing lots of shorts, like the Dave Granger series (Matt Brooks).
His characters develop slowly through the series, and we learn something new with each episode. If you wanted, you could also stick them all together to create a feature length version and give people the option.
Quote: Leevil @ December 27 2009, 11:08 PM GMTEven though you prefer longer pieces, I think in the meantime you'd benefit from doing lots of shorts, like the Dave Granger series (Matt Brooks).
His characters develop slowly through the series, and we learn something new with each episode. If you wanted, you could also stick them all together to create a feature length version and give people the option.
That's a good idea thanks. I've seen some of his videos before and I enjoyed them.
I suggest playing some dada-style word games. Beef up your stream-of-consciousness muscles. Stunning literalism is clay soil to your comedy flower.
What do you mean by dada style word games?
Are you talking to me Ronnie? It might be polite to address me by name.
The exquisite corpse.