Agony aunts

We've had loads of people asking advice but why not one jumbo fun sized adivce thread?
Post your pathetic problems and we will give you advice!
Well more likely take the piss.
Ok more likely make a bunch of lame gags about cocks, sandwiches and Blankety Blank.

So come one come all and share your problems; from pets that give you the horn, to you think your Jason Bourne.

Sootyj first of course.

One of my colleagues has a small office to himself, in which he seems to enjoy farting. All too often I wander in and he is sitting there smiling and clearly enjoying his recipe. He then blushes and looks most embarassed. I don't mind the farting, but I want to spare him his guilty feelings.

Tell me Auntie BCG what should I do?

Tell him you don't mind. In fact, share with him your own farts and have a good old fart party. Embarrassment gone.

Top plan but neither of us are French.

Don't go in his office anymore.

Present him with a Farter of the Year cake and a box of matches to light the candles with then stand well back.

Has it occurred to you that there may be a reason why he has an office to himself?

(This actually occurred to guy I worked with; his personal habits were so disgusting that his colleagues got up a petition to have him moved out of the open plan. He was well pleased - with his own room he was able to set up a model railway layout.)

Awesome.

I want a train set.

At my last job we had all the stinky people (use your imaginations, you know what kind of stinks I'm referring to) in one area. They were all great friends too.

Quote: Aaron @ November 28 2009, 5:15 PM GMT

I want a train set.

View original

I watched James May's Toy Stories: Scaletrix and I'm sure the week after was a train set edition? Did you see it, was it and any good?

Quote: Leevil @ November 28 2009, 5:17 PM GMT

I watched James May's Toy Stories: Scaletrix and I'm sure the week after was a train set edition? Did you see it, was it and any good?

View original

Ah yes, I remember the trail at the end of that. Not seen the next one though. When is/was it on? :/

Quote: AndreaLynne @ November 28 2009, 5:16 PM GMT

At my last job we had all the stinky people (use your imaginations, you know what kind of stinks I'm referring to) in one area. They were all great friends too.

View original

At one time I was in charge of desk allocation in my office. We had two people with the most atrocious BO, a Scotsman who changed his shirt about once a fortnight and who had worn the same shiny suit for twenty years, and an African lady whose diet I cannot even begin to imagine. I occurred to me that it would make sense for them to sit next to one another. It backfired rather as each of them continually came complaining to me about the other's smell.

Quote: Aaron @ November 28 2009, 5:26 PM GMT

Ah yes, I remember the trail at the end of that. Not seen the next one though. When is/was it on? :/

View original

I think it was last week, probably Sundays? I watched it on iPlayer, so can't be sure when it was first broadcast.

According to iPlayer, the Scalextric episode was the last one on. *waits*

Oh, right. Seemed longer than that. Actually, I think I saw Meccano being advertised next, something about a full sized bridge?

So maybe iPlayer is wrong and it was Train sets last week? Confused.

http://www.episodeworld.com/show/James_Mays_Toy_Stories

1. Airfix
2. Plasticine
3. Meccano
4. Scaletrix
5. Hornby
6. Lego

Yep. Seen 2-4 and have 1 recorded. It's been a good marketing exercise, as I now want Meccano and lots of plasticine.