British Comedy Guide

Worst insult in the world

Because some times you really, really want to hurt some one's feelings.

Sofa Masturbator

Too stupid for 2 pints of lager and a packet of crisps.

John Prescott would tell you he's washing his hair.

Tony Blair rejected your friend request.

Fred West wouldn't pick you up if you were hitching.

Bumface.

Quote: sootyj @ November 23 2009, 9:15 AM GMT

Because some times you really, really want to hurt some one's feelings.

Sofa Masturbator

Too stupid for 2 pints of lager and a packet of crisps.

John Prescott would tell you he's washing his hair.

Tony Blair rejected your friend request.

Fred West wouldn't pick you up if you were hitching.

Bumface.

"Hi there, sorry is it Sootyj?"

:D I know Im terrible!

I can't remember which comedian it was said that he heard two lads on the bus talking to each other:

LAD 1:
I saw your mum in town and she was wearing... a shellsuit!

LAD 2:
Tell your mum she still owes my dog f**k money...

(No smiley at request)

Dan

Quote: Paul W @ November 23 2009, 9:23 AM GMT

"Hi there, sorry is it Sootyj?"

:D I know Im terrible!

Did yo mama marry a guy called Anchor and double barrel the surnames?

Yo Mama's so poor, she goes into Kentucky Fried Chicken just to lick other people's fingers

Yo Mama's so stupid, she tried to throw a rock at the ground and missed.

"You've written better"

'He looks like the kind of guy who keeps inflatable kids under the bed'

You look more and more like your mom every day.

I don't know what it is about Dennis Norden, but everyone I know always says the same thing whenever he appears on television -

'Oh Christ, not that paedo again, is he still going? I thought he was dead.'

Anything that begins with:

"I don't mean to be rude but..."
"Don't take this the wrong way..."
"Don't take offence but..."

Quote: Steve Sunshine @ November 23 2009, 1:48 PM GMT

"You've written better"

You've written better.

Welcome to critique.

Quote: Steve Sunshine @ November 23 2009, 1:48 PM GMT

"You've written better"

Quote: sootyj @ November 23 2009, 4:07 PM GMT

You've written better.

Sootyj's written better.

Is your hat the screw top for a sack of shit?

Not even Gary Glitter wants you in his gang.

Quote: sootyj @ November 23 2009, 4:10 PM GMT

Not even Gary Glitter wants you in his gang.

Sootyj wants you in his gang.

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