British Comedy Guide

Happy Birthday Renegade/November Spawned a Monster

Don't be confused by my dual thread – the two aren't related. I'm simply celebrating the genius that is Morrissey and the birth of our favourite "Boobie loving, kitten hating, street rappin' Scorpian" Mr Renegade Carpark, at the same time.

Talking of horoscopes I looked yours up RC as I know you live by them. :)

"You will initially be confused by the number of good wishes you receive today, albeit that they're heavily tinged with sarcasm, until you remember it's your birthday. This will give you yet another excuse to eat a whole chocolate gateux in one sitting leading to a severe bout of indigestion. Subsequently you will spend the evening with a slightly pained expression, which the barmaid you've been hankering after at your local, will mistake for hidden depths of thought and soul. After a disappointing night together you will realise, too late, that your attraction was solely based on a subconscious acknowledgement of Chelsea's striking similarities to your mother. Unable to stand up to either of them you find yourself at the beginning of another long and painful relationship as she worms her way into your family life. Your lucky number is 69 and your lucky colour green. Please avoid asparagus at all costs."

-o-

They're quite specific nowadays aren't they?

As you always write a poem for birthdays I thought I should at least have a go for you...

Renegade, Renegade, Carpark Man
Make us a joke as fast as you can
Make it a weird one
Or make it quite crude
But please do your best
Not to get us all sued.

Hope you enjoy your birthday weekend bonaza bash thingamyjig.

I know it's actually tomorrow (Sat) but as I'm away then I'm starting this early for you.

Big hugs. Jxxx

:) :) :)

Happy Birthday RC you thoroughly nice chap. :)

Happy Birthday RC
No, you're not sleeping it's me
But I am there when you're sleeping
Cos I have a spare key.

Happy Birthday RC - you big sexist eejit! x :D

Quote: Dolly Dagger @ November 20 2009, 8:09 AM GMT

Happy Birthday RC - you big sexist eejit! x :D

I thought these were meant to contain sarcasm?

And happy Birthday RCP! Many happy returns!

Happy Birthday RC! Have a great day tomorrow... you also share your birthday with my boyfriend. Wait a miniute? :S

Happy clamping!

:)

Happy Birthday, RC! Or Arsey, whichever you prefer... ;)

Dan

For he/she's a jolly good fellow, what ever the reds may say
He'll chase the spics the jews away
And really likes to cus, thinks labour is a fuss
For he/she's a jolly good fellow, and never mistakenly gay
For he/she's a libertarian fellow (pause), and he'll take care of us

Strange sort of cake you requested.

Image

Happy Birthday, New Chipolata! I mean, er, Renegade Carpark!

Thank you all very much and especially to Jane for starting this thread (your cocaine is in the post).

The monstrous partying has already begun and tonight is probably going to be very messy and quite regretful.

Thanks again, I <3 you all. (How's that for sarcasm Paul?)

Cheers,

RC

Quote: Kenneth @ November 20 2009, 9:51 AM GMT

Strange sort of cake you requested.

Image

That's not icing!!!! Run!

HBD RC - You're the funniest misogynist I know.

Quote: Paul W @ November 20 2009, 8:15 AM GMT

I thought these were meant to contain sarcasm?

:D
Laughing out loud

Happy birthday matey pip! Have a good 'un!

Quote: Nil Putters @ November 20 2009, 7:55 AM GMT

Happy Birthday RC you thoroughly nice chap. :)

Happy Birthday RC
No, you're not sleeping it's me
But I am there when you're sleeping
Cos I have a spare key.

Nil!

Happy Birthday to the one person on this board I never disagree with and have never had to ask if he hated me.
I hope you have a great day (not sarcasm).

Happy Birthday RC!

Have a wicked weekend!

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