I've been invited to a book-launch, but having never been to one, I don't know what to expect. My only experience is from fictionalised accounts, which usually involve wine and nibbles, and egotistical authors being derisive toward one another. While I'm not a writer, my lovely girlfriend is, so presumably she has the opportunity to meet other people in the industry? Or somefink?
Quote: Nogget @ November 16 2009, 5:33 PM GMTI've been invited to a book-launch, but having never been to one, I don't know what to expect. My only experience is from fictionalised accounts, which usually involve wine and nibbles, and egotistical authors being derisive toward one another. While I'm not a writer, my ladyfriend is, so presumably she has the opportunity to meet other people in the industry? Or somefink?
All you need to know is that there is no such thing as a free launch!
Get very drunk, ask some writer at random what his book's about, ignore his answer, say "That Bravo Two Zero was good. Why don't you write something like that, you twat?", tell everyone to get a "proper job", vomit over the book display, get chucked out... That's my advice anyway. 
Marc should know. Apparently someone went to his. 
The last one I was at I asked Karin Slaughter to sign the copy I had been given by RH so I could get it up quick on eBay. My how everone chuckled. 
Ooh, I have read a Karin Slaughter book. It was quite fun.
I've been to two. The first one was full of snotty pretentious people that I know didn't read the book or even had any interest in it. The second was for a close friend and it was packed with people I knew and I had a great time. We had a great time picking on the phonies.
Just tell people that you converse regularly with the Marc Pearson of Hard Evidence fame.
If that doesn't work (???), then get your booze and nibbles on my man, as your lady friend is going to be swanning about, giving it the big 'un with literary types and you'll be ignored as you can't advance anyone's career.
Then do what Tim said above, but add that 'Being Jordan' and 'Harry Potter' should have won the Booker prize and not some feminist shit about Africans or whatever the f**k it was.
Quote: AndreaLynne @ November 16 2009, 5:57 PM GMTI've been to two.
Owldrea?
And don't forget to say to one of the word-monkeys, "Are you going to put me in one of your books, eh? Eh? Come on, cheer up you miserable c**t!". They enjoy that, the novelists.
Quote: Tim Walker @ November 16 2009, 6:13 PM GMTAnd don't forget to say to one of the word-monkeys, "Are you going to put me in one of your books, eh? Eh? Come on, cheer up you miserable c**t!". They enjoy that, the novelists.
Are you going to put me in one of your sitcoms, Tim? Eh? Eh? Come on c**t.
*waits*
Quote: Leevil @ November 16 2009, 6:10 PM GMTOwldrea?
We had so much fun at the second party. Because it was a close friend, we were given free reign. I talked to one man for a while about how courageous my friend was to write chick lit when she used to be a man. Another friend had everyone convinced that the main character was really her, and so on. Lots of laughs. Oh, and we drank way too much.
I don't write Jews. They already control the media, so I'm not giving them any more publicity. 
Quote: Renegade Carpark @ November 16 2009, 6:08 PM GMTJust tell people that you converse regularly with the Marc Pearson of Hard Evidence fame.
It's got to be Mark Pearson or Marc Peirson, they are pronounced completely differently. Either way they will still say who.
I remember going to one years ago and it was loads of fun. Me, Ali and Muktar went down to WH Smiths and bought loads of copies of Satanic Verses...
...there wasn't any wine or nibbles, but we did toast the author's work.