In memoriam (a sketch)

COMPERE:
Ladies and gentlemen,
I know you've all come here tonight expecting to see and enjoy a gala evening of comedy presented by and dedicated to the country's finest and funniest women comedians.

It is however my sad duty to inform you that the coach that was bringing our ladies here tonight has been involved in an accident on the motorway. Everyone aboard was killed.

Refunds will, of course, be made via your credit and debit cards.

On behalf of the girls who died, I'd like to say all their husbands had small penises.

Also, it's really inconvenient having to queue for a public toilet.

Thank you.

Quote: Roodeye @ November 1 2009, 12:10 AM BST

COMPERE:
Ladies and gentlemen,
I know you've all come here tonight expecting to see and enjoy a gala evening of comedy presented by and dedicated to the country's finest and funniest women comedians.

It is however my sad duty to inform you that the coach that was bringing our ladies here tonight has been involved in an accident on the motorway. Everyone aboard was killed.

Refunds will, of course, be made via your credit and debit cards.

On behalf of the girls who died, I'd like to say all their husbands had small penises.

Also, it's really inconvenient having to queue for a public toilet.

Thank you.

View original

I could never say that about my husband.

And I would just use the gents...

Quote: Roodeye @ November 1 2009, 12:10 AM BST

COMPERE:
Ladies and gentlemen,
I know you've all come here tonight expecting to see and enjoy a gala evening of comedy presented by and dedicated to the country's finest and funniest women comedians.

It is however my sad duty to inform you that the coach that was bringing our ladies here tonight has been involved in an accident on the motorway. Everyone aboard was killed.

Refunds will, of course, be made via your credit and debit cards.

On behalf of the girls who died, I'd like to say all their husbands had small penises.

Also, it's really inconvenient having to queue for a public toilet.

Thank you.

View original

We asked a hundred people if this joke was funny. Our survey said...

I'm not sure I geddit?

I didn't get it either. Maybe it's one of them anti-jokes that we keep hearing about.

My auntie tells terrible jokes, so you're probably right.

Maybe add something about "If men had periods ..."

Quote: Leevil @ November 1 2009, 12:28 AM BST

My auntie tells terrible jokes, so you're probably right.

View original

Who's your auntie? Jim Davidson?

I thought it was pretty funny. It could be a runner with different sets of comedians (political satirists, topical comedians, impressionists etc) dying in tragic accidents and their 'jokes' being boiled down to a one-line unfunny statement by a cynical compere.

Quote: don rushmore @ November 1 2009, 12:17 AM BST

We asked a hundred people if this joke was funny...

View original

I think I can name the people you asked.

Moving along, it's a pity Leevil and Ben didn't get it but comedy's like that. Sometimes you score a sensational bull's eye: sometimes your arrow curves like a boomerang and goes flying up your own rear end.

However, as long as the likes of JohnnyD and Kasm are in tune with it, I don't think I'm doing too badly.

Thanks, guys.

it's hilarious

Quote: bushbaby @ November 1 2009, 3:03 PM BST

it's hilarious

View original

Quite right, BB.

Thanks.

Thought it was very funny.

Quote: pedros @ November 1 2009, 8:59 PM BST

Thought it was very funny.

View original

Thanks, Pedros.

I knew, as soon as I saw your avatar, that you had excellent taste in comedy.

To be honest in its obviousness and chauvinism it struck me as a mirror image of the sort of humour you are supposedly satirising.