Awwwww.
Cats are ace.
BCG Cat. Page 4
This little kitty gets my vote -
I've even written a poem about him -
Barnabus
Dear sweet Barnabus
As a lonely, disgusting and quite frankly, hideously hairy woman
I can never attract a human male, so you will have to do
Faithful Barnabus
I project my human emotions on to you
and I pretend you are human too
Is that wrong?
Oh goodness Barnabus, I seem to have accidentally dropped a tin of Felix
All over my private lady regions
Lick it up, there's a good boy
Heh, a pussy licking pussy, I am so very clever
Time for me to write a science fiction novel about a race of cat people
Who are much better then humans, especially men, who are ick
I bet I win a feminist prize for my outstanding literature
And I could dedicate the book to you
Dear Sweet Barnabus
Quote: Renegade Carpark @ October 23 2009, 11:55 PM BSTThis little kitty gets my vote -
I've even written a poem about him -
Barnabus
Dear sweet Barnabus
As a lonely, disgusting and quite frankly, hideously hairy woman
I can never attract a human male, so you will have to do
Faithful Barnabus
I project my human emotions on to you
and I pretend you are human too
Is that wrong?
Oh goodness Barnabus, I seem to have accidentally dropped a tin of Felix
All over my private lady regions
Lick it up, there's a good boy
Heh, a pussy licking pussy, I am so very clever
Time for me to write a science fiction novel about a race of cat people
Who are much better then humans, especially men, who are ick
I bet I win a feminist prize for my outstanding literature
And I could dedicate the book to you
Dear Sweet Barnabus
Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww @ poem.
Aww @ cat. 
Quote: Renegade Carpark @ October 23 2009, 11:55 PM BSTI've even written a poem about him -
Barnabus
Dear sweet Barnabus
As a lonely, disgusting and quite frankly, hideously hairy woman
I can never attract a human male, so you will have to do
Faithful Barnabus
I project my human emotions on to you
and I pretend you are human too
Is that wrong?
Oh goodness Barnabus, I seem to have accidentally dropped a tin of Felix
All over my private lady regions
Lick it up, there's a good boy
Heh, a pussy licking pussy, I am so very clever
Time for me to write a science fiction novel about a race of cat people
Who are much better then humans, especially men, who are ick
I bet I win a feminist prize for my outstanding literature
And I could dedicate the book to you
Dear Sweet Barnabus
You are so wrong, but hilarious. 
I shall have all of them, thank you please.
(And no poems Mr. Renegade.)
Quote: zooo @ October 24 2009, 12:04 AM BSTI shall have all of them, thank you please.
(And no poems Mr. Renegade.)
Wuv 'em, wuv 'em, wuv 'em !
Remember, God gave us the cat in order that man might stroke the lion !
Quote: Renegade Carpark @ October 23 2009, 11:55 PM BSTThis little kitty gets my vote -
I've even written a poem about him -
Barnabus
Dear sweet Barnabus
As a lonely, disgusting and quite frankly, hideously hairy woman
I can never attract a human male, so you will have to do
Faithful Barnabus
I project my human emotions on to you
and I pretend you are human too
Is that wrong?
Oh goodness Barnabus, I seem to have accidentally dropped a tin of Felix
All over my private lady regions
Lick it up, there's a good boy
Heh, a pussy licking pussy, I am so very clever
Time for me to write a science fiction novel about a race of cat people
Who are much better then humans, especially men, who are ick
I bet I win a feminist prize for my outstanding literature
And I could dedicate the book to you
Dear Sweet Barnabus
Ok that's as wrong as anything I ever posted. What ever inspired this horrific misogynistic screed? Is Barnabus perhaps your self?
Quote: sootyj @ October 24 2009, 9:00 AM BSTOk that's as wrong as anything I ever posted. What ever inspired this horrific misogynistic screed? Is Barnabus perhaps your self?
My beautiful poem 'Barnabus' was inspired by several real world factors - women who write books of poetry about cats, feminist science fiction involving cat people, the 'fluffy' craze / fetish and those creepy adverts for cat food involving women in semi-romantic situations with their cats.
I wouldn't say it was particularly mysogynistic, it just happened to involve a woman having sex with her cat. It's certainly no less or more sexist then writing a joke about men having sex with sheep, goats, dogs, etc. Which I'm sure you've never done Sooty. (write a joke about, not actually have sex with animals) 
'Barnabus' has provoked a strong reaction in some people, so it must have an element of truth to it. How uncomfortably funny is that?
(*sheesh* I write a thousand paedo jokes, no one bats an eyelid, I write one silly poem about an imanginary woman and an imaginary cat and people are up in arms.) 
It was written with passion and beauty, a glimpse into your beautiful human soul so to speak.
Quote: Renegade Carpark @ October 24 2009, 9:33 AM BST'Barnabus' has provoked a strong reaction in some people, so it must have an element of truth to it.
I'm not often given to posting recollections of sordid sexual episodes from my childhood, but I do recall a girl at school who was said to regularly smear tinned dog food over a private part of her anatomy and then have her dog lick her clean. When I first heard this tale, I assumed it was just a horrible untruth. But the following year I was in the same Art class as this girl and she quietly bragged of getting sexual satisfaction from her dog. Perhaps she was just "going along with the nasty rumour" in the hope that it would stop. It didn't.
Quote: Kenneth @ October 24 2009, 11:28 AM BSTI'm not often given to posting recollections of sordid sexual episodes from my childhood, but I do recall a girl at school who was said to regularly smear tinned dog food over a private part of her anatomy and then have her dog lick her clean. When I first heard this tale, I assumed it was just a horrible untruth. But the following year I was in the same Art class as this girl and she quietly bragged of getting sexual satisfaction from her dog. Perhaps she was just "going along with the nasty rumour" in the hope that it would stop. It didn't.
Yeah we had the same thing at my high school. Although that story ended with her family jumping out from behind the sofa shouting 'surprise'... Do these urban legends do the rounds at every school, or are pets really that good at cunnilingus?
Quote: AngieBaby @ October 24 2009, 11:52 AM BSTDo these urban legends do the rounds at every school, or are pets really that good at cunnilingus?
Indeed, probably just popular urban legends. I don't know whether pets are particularly adept at at cunnilingus.
Getting back on topic, but remaining in the squalid realm of naughty stuff between people and their pets, here's another candidate for the BCG Cat:
