British Comedy Guide

Things That Wouldn't Exist Without Men...

Now before you all start up a heated debate on the pros and cons of men on the planet (I'm looking at you Ms Dagger and Mr Carpark), I'm writing a script and need to have a list of five or six really esoteric things which wouldn't exist if men weren't around.

I could write them myself ( Whistling nnocently ) but thought I'd much rather let you lot do the hard work.

So I'm not really looking for boring, usual, predictable answers such as "war", "rape", "famine", "injustice" and "indoor bowls". More for the little things that without men around would never have been invented, or ideas that never would have survived, e.g. the offside rule, gloves designed especially for driving, B&Q, Allen keys, gas barbecues, pedometers or 'The Darkness'.

All suggestions gratefully received. (If you want to list 'Things That Wouldn't Exist Without Women' then on your own poor heads be it.)

Thanks. :)

Toilet seat. They would all be built-in.

EDIT

And war, rape, famine, injustice...

Civilisation.

*snigger*

No. Seriously. Ummm... Well, you're heading into Michael McIntyre territory here, Tim. Reminding me awfully of his routine at the man drawer.

Quote: Aaron @ October 6 2009, 1:48 AM BST

Michael McIntyre

Now, he belongs on the alternative thread. Could only have been invented by a woman.

Really? Oh Jesus, well... make it 'Things That Wouldn't Exist Without Men (That McIntyre Wouldn't Attempt To Stretch Out To 10 Minutes Of Material)' Errr

Don't even bother trying to watch this Tim (terrible picture), but do have a listen to the routine: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=grRI-m-Nr2U

Although I've not sat through it so it could be mis-titled and miss out a chunk. Or something. But hopefully you'll at least get the jist.

Sapphic erotica?

shelving

big speakers

sheds

mini-sheds

"gadgets"

the word "gadget"

smut

Quote: Aaron @ October 6 2009, 1:53 AM BST

Don't even bother trying to watch this Tim (terrible picture), but do have a listen to the routine: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=grRI-m-Nr2U

Although I've not sat through it so it could be mis-titled and miss out a chunk. Or something. But hopefully you'll at least get the jist.

Well, I managed to tolerate two and a half minutes before I had the overwhelming urge to go out and murder a prostitute... But this is more "man in a relationship" type of stuff - the loft, the man drawer (? I'm sorry, but that doesn't strike a chord with me at all).

Carry On films

Football

Last orders

( *whispers* Wave )

Swiss Army knives.

Harriet Harman

Pot Noodles.

Rustlers burgers.

Micro Chips.

women

sheds

I'm pretty adamant about sheds

:D

Definitely sheds and Rustlers burgers. Very specific gadgets I'd agree with - such as a lock de-icing device to go on a key-ring, or a mini-Mag lights.

Quote: Clockface @ October 6 2009, 2:05 AM BST

Harriet Harman

:D

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