Quote: AndreaLynne @ September 16 2009, 3:15 PM BSTHe already does that with the kids about me. Thus his "idiot" status.
Doesn't mean you have to retaliate! Take the higher ground. No?
Status report Page 1,138
Quote: chipolata @ September 16 2009, 3:28 PM BSTTo be fair to him, and without knowing all the details, some people don't know how to handle other people being ill. Especially loved ones. It freaks them out and they act out in odd ways. I'm not defending him, just saying there's two sides to every argument...
My husband had was diagnosed with congestive heart failure when Aynsley was 6 weeks old and almost died. He was in really bad shape for a couple of years and then started to miraculously get better. When I got my diagnosis in December 2007, he was a great help to me, like I was for him. However, when I lost my hair during chemo and really started to look sick, he changed and became downright mean toward me. I actually caught him slagging me off on the phone once saying "She just has cancer, what is the big deal?"
The nail in the "idiot" coffin came when I again caught him on the phone saying that sleeping with me was like sleeping with Frankenstein. Yeah, that was pretty much the end for me. 
Quote: AndreaLynne @ September 16 2009, 3:39 PM BSTMy husband had was diagnosed with congestive heart failure when Aynsley was 6 weeks old and almost died. He was in really bad shape for a couple of years and then started to miraculously get better. When I got my diagnosis in December 2007, he was a great help to me, like I was for him. However, when I lost my hair during chemo and really started to look sick, he changed and became downright mean toward me. I actually caught him slagging me off on the phone once saying "She just has cancer, what is the big deal?"
The nail in the "idiot" coffin came when I again caught him on the phone saying that sleeping with me was like sleeping with Frankenstein. Yeah, that was pretty much the end for me.
Fair enough, he does a bit of an idiot.
And you should have said, "You mean Frankenstein's monster, not Frankenstein. Would it kill you to read a book once in a while?"
Quote: AndreaLynne @ September 16 2009, 2:38 PM BSTHey everybody!! Well, she made it through surgery fine. They really had to break her arm again to get the bone back to where it should have been. It was quite a bit out of whack. She had a hard time waking up and freaked when she finally did. But she was so brave. The surgery lasted about an hour and she was in recovery for about 90 minutes. She slept all the way home and then woke up and asked for something to eat the second we pulled up to the house. So, we took a ride to KFC and she got to eat chicken drumsticks. It was a very long day, but went so much better than I figured it would.
Thanks for all the well wishes. I told her that people in Britain were wishing her good luck and she thought that was so cool!
Phew, now we can relax and go for a pub luncheon..
Quote: chipolata @ September 16 2009, 3:42 PM BSTFair enough, he does a bit of an idiot.
And you should have said, "You mean Frankenstein's monster, not Frankenstein. Would it kill you to read a book once in a while?"
Thanks Chip.
Quote: billwill @ September 16 2009, 3:43 PM BSTPhew, now we can relax and go for a pub luncheon..
Make sure you order something traditional for me with a large Guinness.
Quote: chipolata @ September 16 2009, 3:42 PM BSTFair enough, he does a bit of an idiot.
And you should have said, "You mean Frankenstein's monster, not Frankenstein. Would it kill you to read a book once in a while?"
Frankenstein [the doctor himself] was probably quite handsome.
Quote: billwill @ September 16 2009, 3:49 PM BSTFrankenstein (the doctor himself) was probably quite handsome.
Kids pretty soon figure out the truth about their parents. And they can't help still loving the 'bad' parent, however much of a tit they are. Still it's not pleasant growing up living with two parents who clearly no longer respect, let alone love, each other.
We're still all under the same roof. My kids have never seen my husband be affectionate with me. I got to the point where I just accepted it. I'm a natural hugger and even hugged him last night when we got home. I honestly think that my oldest understands what's going on and knows that I'm staying cuz I can't afford to leave him right now. This situation won't last forever.
Can't you chuck him out?
Well, he's paying our rent as he's the only one working. I can't work so that I can have health insurance (yes, you heard me right, and so many Americans don't think our system is all f**ked up). After all my surgeries are done, I'll probably just leave with the kids.
Quote: AndreaLynne @ September 16 2009, 3:39 PM BSTThe nail in the "idiot" coffin came when I again caught him on the phone saying that sleeping with me was like sleeping with Frankenstein. Yeah, that was pretty much the end for me.
Quote: Dolly Dagger @ September 16 2009, 3:55 PM BSTKids pretty soon figure out the truth about their parents. And they can't help still loving the 'bad' parent, however much of a tit they are. Still it's not pleasant growing up living with two parents who clearly no longer respect, let alone love, each other.
I don't know about that. My eldest cousin seems to genuinely hate his dad since my aunt chucked him out. I understand he refuses to go out with him 90% of the time.
Quote: AndreaLynne @ September 16 2009, 4:05 PM BSTWell, he's paying our rent as he's the only one working. I can't work so that I can have health insurance (yes, you heard me right, and so many Americans don't think our system is all f**ked up). After all my surgeries are done, I'll probably just leave with the kids.
Maybe it's different in the US, but I've known women here (stay at home mums) with no income. Wrongly or rightly their spouse has had to leave the family home when they've split and the woman gets the house because of the children. The government then pays the rent or mortgage.
Quote: Aaron @ September 16 2009, 4:06 PM BST
Yeah, I couldn't believe it. I've had a couple skin cancer scares with scars from that. I have a large scar over my partially reconstructed right breast (I have the operation to fix that in the next month) and a massive scar under my right arm where my lymph nodes were taken out. When he said this my hair had just started to grow back. I absolutely hate him for it. 
I'm still trying to wake up following a snooze following a pub lunch in Surrey.