The Fairy Godfather

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The Fairy Godfather (for radio)
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F/X:WASHING UP

CINDERELLA:
Oh, how I hate my stepmother and ugly sisters! I do wish I could go to the Prince's ball this evening!

F/X:*POOOF!!* A MAFIOSO APPEARS IN A CLOUD OF SMOKE. THERE IS THE SUCKING AND INHALING OF A CIGAR. CINDERELLA COUGHS ASTHMATICALLY

MAFIOSO:
(MENACING) You lookin' at me?

CINDERELLA:
Who are you?

MAFIOSO:
(EXHALES) I'm your Fairy Godfather…

CINDERELLA:
Fairy Godfather! I guess I *will* get to go the ball after all!

MAFIOSO:
Guess again, Chuckles.

F/X:MONEY CLIP BEING OPENED AND CASH BEING HANDED OVER

MAFIOSO:
(CIGAR IN MOUTH) Here's 500 notes. Buy yourself some crotchless knickers and a big tub of lube. (REMOVES CIGAR) A lot of men are going to make you offers you can't refuse…

END

Love it

The pun is so obvious (after hearing it) that I can't believe it hasn't been done before. It must have, right? But I can't think of any examples.

Ah don't say that Kevin, Dan might Google it and discover 107,000 links to Fairy Godfathers!

But not necessarily similar to this one - I think it's v good and could be extended a bit too - rather than just be a punchline, take it further.

I'd say it's worth sending off places too.

Jx

Cheers people. (Even Kevin with his esoteric not good/not bad critique!)

Dan

It's pretty good and I liked the last line (which came from the Godfather I think?) But, the cigar bits might not be relevant for radio.

To clarify: good.

Quote: Nigel Kelly @ July 21 2009, 9:37 AM BST

It's pretty good and I liked the last line (which came from the Godfather I think?) But, the cigar bits might not be relevant for radio.

View original

I see your point.

It was more the (overacted) sucking and exhaling effects I was trying to ram home, unsubtly.

Cheers all

Dan

What I want to know is where you buy your crotchless knickers Dan, I'd shop around at those prices!!

I'm not sure I really get this one
I'm wondering if I'm missing something.
I understand the switch between the Godmother & the Godfather.

And then the Godfather is planning to pimp Cinderella out at the ball is he?

Also I think 'Chuckles' is the sort of thing they'd say to a guy, or someone who was laughing
Something like sweetcheeks or dollface would have sounded better to me.

As I say I think I've probably missed the point of this one somewhere along the line.

Quote: Marc P @ July 21 2009, 9:51 AM BST

What I want to know is where you buy your crotchless knickers Dan, I'd shop around at those prices!!

View original

Indeed. A monkey is a bit steep for undies and lube.