Wrote when particularly sozzled - can't remember writing a word, but can remember swearing blind to the pub that it was Abba who released it:
F/X Ringing phone
RASPUTIN(Welsh Valley accent) Hello. Rasputin's phone, Rasputin speaking. Oh right. Hiya. (Shouts) Mam!
MAM(Welsh Valley accent) What? Who is it?
RASPUTINIt's Abba, it is.
MAMOh shit, what do they want now then?
RASPUTINWhat do you want now, Abba? Oh right. Yeah. Yeah. Ok. 'Anga Banga. Mam!
MAMWhat?
RASPUTINThey say for us to look what they did for Chiquitos
MAMI hate Mexican. No deal!
RASPUTINRight. Sorry Abba, no deal.
F/XPhone slams down.
F/XPhone rings
RASPUTINHello. Rasputin's phone, Rasputin speaking. Oh right. Hiya. (Shouts) Mam!
MAM Who is it?
RASPUTINBoney M.
MAM Who the bollocks are Boney M, then?
RASPUTINBy the Rivers of Babylon Mam.
MAM Oh, By the Rivers of Babylon. I love that.
RASPUTINThey say they'll add the line 'Russia's Greatest Love Machine'.
MAMAh, there we go then. We'll have that.
