Quote: RubyMae - Glamourous Snowdrop at Large @ July 15 2009, 8:34 PM BSTYou know your skirt is too short when the guy next to you at the bar asks for a price.
It's really too short if he asks for a discount because you're on your period.
Growing Old Together? Page 9
But he can be funny. Like when I wanted to see the burning barrels, he said on the phone "What the bloody hell do you want to pay and see that shit for when you can watch the local teenagers set fire to cars from your window for free?".
Quote: Tim Walker @ July 15 2009, 8:38 PM BSTIt's really too short if he asks for a discount because you're on your period.
Oldies can be bad too I would like to point out. Here is a hand on heart true story.
My Dads friend was shopping in Iceland and looking for something for her husbands tea. She spots these pork chops, last pack, half price, at the bottom of the chest freezer and decided to get them so she lifts the lid and bends down to get them from the bottom. Next thing, she is waking up, on the floor, bleeding from her head, loads of people around her. Her first thought was that the lid must have come down and whacked her on the head...
....until she spots the police....
....she asks what happened and it turned out that when she was about the pick up the chops, this little old lady saw them and seeing she was going to take them, picked up a frozen leg of lamb, smashed her over the head, grabbed the chops, and calmly wandered to the checkout!
I've heard this for years and it never fails to crack me up.
I don't tend to grow old on this site cos longevity is not big in my family and the death clock gave me a year or so 
Still things don't tend to last forever as people move on to other things so enjoy it while you can. Talking of which we having a proper BCG launch in the summer? I want to show off my mankini.
And if Don R turns up and he turns out to be Rowan Atkinson I win a tenner.
And Griff goes as well it'll be a sizzler. My money's on the Griff boy. Good Welsh stock. Like beef stock only welshier.
I used to be a Chortle poster. And then everyone stopped posting on there for some reason. They were loads meaner than the posters on here, and most of them did stand-up comedy.
Yeah, I looked a couple of time but to be honest they all seemed a bit cruel to each other so I was never tempted to sign up.
Quote: don rushmore @ July 15 2009, 11:43 AM BSTAs I have said before, I take great satisfaction in knowing that most on here will fail miserably in their attempts at breaking into 'the biz'.
Such a charming person!
Quote: don rushmore @ July 15 2009, 12:15 PM BSTIn my opinion, several people on this site are not very nice.
Pots and kettles spring to mind!
If you listen carefully, you can hear him masturbating to that thought, right now.
Quote: don rushmore @ July 15 2009, 12:15 PM BSTBut to answer your question, Matthew: many people in the comedy industry are absolute bastards, I don't want them to be joined by any more.
So that's a sideways swipe at those you hope will succeed!
Well, I'll still be sitting on some fence, somewhere, somehow.
"There's a fence for us, somewhere a fence for us, close your eyes and I'll take you there, somewhere vague, in between all the diatribe, somewhere..." orchestral swell, etc.
Quote: Dolly Dagger @ July 15 2009, 9:01 PM BSTI used to be a Chortle poster. And then everyone stopped posting on there for some reason. They were loads meaner than the posters on here, and most of them did stand-up comedy.
And did any of them follow you here?
Quote: Chappers @ July 15 2009, 10:11 PM BSTAnd did any of them follow you here?
Maybe!
Quote: SlagA @ July 15 2009, 10:04 PM BSTWell, I'll still be sitting on some fence, somewhere, somehow.
"There's a fence for us, somewhere a fence for us, close your eyes and I'll take you there, somewhere vague, in between all the diatribe, somewhere..." orchestral swell, etc.
*Pushes Slaggy off* 
Quote: Chappers @ July 15 2009, 9:58 PM BSTSo that's a sideways swipe at those you hope will succeed!
No.
*Changes the record quickly and hopes everyone just moves on*
Back to topic, I'd be interested to see the first BCGer on telly. No idea who it would be but I think there is a lot talent here and at the end of the day, it's all about learning rather than competing. 
In that case Gavin and Lee have already made it.