William Shakespeare - Genius or twat? Page 4

Welcome to the thread that says: Hi, here at BSG we're morons*.

Incidentally, Bill Bryson's Shakespeare biography is essential reading for halfwits wishing to halfway pontificate on the bard. Plus, it's a very short book, which makes it ideal for chatroom 'tards with short attention spans, who can't even sit through a 25-minute sitcom without pressing pause and checking the computer to see whether any fools have responded to their last foolish post.

* But Kenneth is the biggest moron of all for not getting the joke.

Quote: Kenneth @ May 12 2009, 12:57 PM BST

Welcome to the thread that says: Hi, here at BSG we're morons*.

Incidentally, Bill Bryson's Shakespeare biography is essential reading for halfwits wishing to halfway pontificate on the bard. Plus, it's a very short book, which makes it ideal for chatroom 'tards with short attention spans, who can't even sit through a 25-minute sitcom without pressing pause and checking the computer to see whether any fools have responded to their last foolish post.

* But Kenneth is the biggest moron of all.

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Forget Shakespeare this guy rocks

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eeg2sqaPfyY

amazing

Quote: Kenneth @ May 12 2009, 12:57 PM BST

Welcome to the thread that says: Hi, here at BSG we're morons*.

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Hang on, all our threads essentially say that.

Quote: Morrace @ May 12 2009, 3:25 AM BST

The original 'West Side Story' Broadway production was in 1957. Shakespeare was dead by then.

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Quote: Renegade Carpark @ May 12 2009, 12:35 PM BST

Yeah, I know, it was a joke. Like the kid on the internet who claimed Lord of the Rings was a ripoff of Dragaonball Z.

Kurosawa's Ran was a great adaption of King Lear and just about every gangster movie ever made has it's roots in MacBeth or Julius Caesar.

Shakey also has about 500 pubs named after him, so that alone is enough to warrant a genius tag.

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You quoted me out of context, Retrograde. Here's the quote within context:

Quote: Morrace @ May 12 2009, 3:25 AM BST

The original 'West Side Story' Broadway production was in 1957. Shakespeare was dead by then.

In 1996 Baz Luhrmann, not Shakespeare, cast Leonardo Di Caprio as Romeo. Shakespeare was dead by then, anyway.

Shakespeare was never referred to as 'Shakey' - the only showbiz person (which Shakespeare was) with that nickname' was Shakin' Stevens (born Michael Barrett, 4 March 1948); his main break in Show Business was in the musical 'Elvis'. Elvis was dead by then - but not as dead as Shakespeare who 'left the building' on 23 April 1616.

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P.S. I'm learning to play the moronica.

Quote: SlagA @ May 11 2009, 10:38 PM BST

Any guy who pumped out hundreds of sonnets to impress the ladies wasn't getting enough and was clearly too thick to work out that it was a tactic that wasn't working.

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Quote: Godot Taxis @ May 11 2009, 11:27 PM BST

'a custom more honoured in the breach than the observance.'

... well known saying

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...?

Quote: Nil Putters @ May 12 2009, 9:23 AM BST

Someone might still be catching up on Sooty's sketches.

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*chuckles heartily*

Quote: Bryan Worrall @ May 12 2009, 1:00 PM BST

Forget Shakespeare this guy rocks

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eeg2sqaPfyY

amazing

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No, he's a massive bell end.

Quote: Bryan Worrall @ May 12 2009, 1:00 PM BST

Forget Shakespeare this guy rocks

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eeg2sqaPfyY

amazing

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So does this - but it's funnier

Quote: Gavin @ May 11 2009, 5:44 PM BST

I just couldn't get past I bite my thumb at thee sir. "Yeh well I'll kick you in the balls you stuck up little rich boy."

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!

People will always claim they were Shakespeare.

I claimed I was when I wrote my play about 70s cults for temporary staff THE TEMP EST. Or the idea that Shakespeare was a slave owned by 2 men THE 2 GENTLEMEN THEY OWN HER is just silly. As is the theory that Shakespeare predicted it Ain't Half Hot Mum and Never the Twain for which he wrote plays to amuse the star missus. A theory I read in THE MERRY WIVES OF WINDSOR DAVIES. Albeit he did forsee the metric system in MEASURE FOR MEASURE and the current expenses malarky in THE COMEDY OF ERRORS. And that with the mess the economy would be MUCH ADO ABOUT NOTHING, as well as the collapse of Brown's government LOVE'S LABOURS LOST. Perhaps Gordon will hope it's a MIDSUMMER'S NIGHT DREAMS. Paul Kay's offered to help Gordon but who wants help from THE MERCHANT OF PENNIS? He helped Bono though but that's AS U2 LIKES IT. Mind you my car mechanic has fixed the left turning on my steering wheel so he's done THE TAMING OF THE SLEW. Cheeky git his name to Well and opened a garrage with his 2 brothers just so he could say ALLS WELL THAT ENDS WELL. He took almost a fortnight to fix my steering wheel I called him ON THE TWELTH NIGHT FOR WHAT YOU WILL find is he was in breech of contract. I used to think he wrote The Homecoming turns out it was a PINTER'S TALE. But now I need to get wheels for my car. So I'm reading PERICLES PRINCE OF TYRES.
Anyway I'm off to buy some Rizlas from the tobacconists run by The Duke of Edinburgh and the Prince of Wales. Expensive, but hey they are TWO NOBLES SKINS MEN.

sooty, you forgot his two greatest works -

The anorexic woman who wants to be king in ALLY MACBETH and his anal porn master piece JULIE'S ASS SEIZURE.

A Midsummer Night's Wet Dream

I've started frequenting a more upmarket bongo mag/movie store just outside the Globe these are some of my favourites.

Boneo and July gets ate out.
Flash MAC at BETH
KING LEARs at school girls
HAMs will LET you do what you want (Muppet fetish film starring Kermit and his ladyfreind).
Oh! Hell Oh! That's good.
Titties Androginous.
Julie's lust squeezer (an extreme lesbian wrestling epic)
Anne's Pony up Cleo's Twat yah! (Sloan bestiality a bit niche)
Curry up La La's Anus (A weird Asian cbeebies sodomy film)
Oil us and press it da. (Welsh porn)
Rimmin' in Athens

Of course they're all a bit tragic.

Hell at least I'm thorough.

And once again sooty, you've missed -

Corny Old Anus
Brothel-lo
Ass you like it
Measure for Pleasure
Much a Spew about Nuttin'
The Reaming of the Screw

I declare a pun off! Pun war! Pun war! Pun war!