Blind Ambition

A blind man is standing at the reception of the 'Guide Dog for the Blind Association' where the lady on reception is sitting behind the desk.

Woman ends her telephone conversation. Looks up to the blind man.

WOMAN: Yes sir, can I help?

MAN: Yes thankyou, I would like a new dog please (looking down at his dog)...

WOMAN: Erm....

MAN: (looking down)....Just fancied a change, got any new ones come in? Im not after a labrador again, maybe something..bit more.. a bit more ooooo y'know

WOMAN: Right...

MAN: Just fancied a bit of an upgrade y'know, he's been great...he really has...we've had some good times..

WOMAN:...Im not sure if-

MAN: -look if im being honest, he doesn't do anything, he's just not interested and seems fed up all the time, he never wants to go out anymore..I literally have to drag him around everywhere I go...

WOMAN: Oh dearthat's not-

MAN: --yes its a bit embarrassing.

WOMAN:....oooo k.

MAN: You haven't got any of those Dalmatians back there have you?

WOMAN: Noooo...we don't (reaching for her walkie talkie)

MAN: I do like those ones...y'know what I mean..I do love the standard blind man with a labrador look, but times are changing, people move on...blind people move on...I just want a better dog, im just tired of dragging him around everywhere I go..miserable thing.

Woman gets up from her seat, walks round from reception and walks infront of the desk where the Blind man is standing.

WOMAN: Sir?...

MAN: Oh there you are...

WOMAN: Sir?...

MAN: Yes I was saying, tried to get an upgrade couple of months ago, wanted a black one...but..

WOMAN: SIR???

MAN: Yes dear, what is it?

WOMAN: Thats not your guide dog, that's a travel Buggie.....?

MAN: (Looking down)....I know, I know.......The dead bastard's inside it!

I like the build up, but it lacks a punchline imo. Change the Buggie for something funnier and lose the last line.

It was meant to draw the reader or viewer into believing the dog is actually behind the desk, and the dog infact is still alive, but is just old and frail.

When the lady walks behind the desk, the reader believes the the blind man has been dragging a travel buggie around and not the dog-as if a punchline...when infact the blindman knows this as the dog is DEAD hence why he is 'not interested and is always dragging him around'.... the punchline is that he's dead.

Maybe I didnt write it properly. Cheers

I got the idea it wasn't going to be a dog from the receptionists comments, I just felt the ending was weak after a good build up.

Would it not be more snappy if the blind man had not realised that his poor dog had died?

ok ok...I can't change your opinion. I think its not bad, not my best stuff but not bad. just wrote it up whilst watching 'Songs of Praise'. Cheers Nil boy x

Maybe it would work if you considered giving the WOMAN her own dialogue and maybe you could expand/control the situation to get to a better place.

Quote: Scottidog @ April 26 2009, 5:58 PM BST

ok ok...I can't change your opinion.

View original

Ok.

I guess that could work....just dragging a dog carcus about...that does make me laugh.

I rather like the gag here. I think the double punch works, and if the blind man knows the dog is dead that goes someway to making it less un-PC.

Finally!....thanks Timbo. Somebody gets the double punchline.