British Comedy Guide

Does anyone fancy writing a joint sketch on here? Page 15

Quote: Tom G @ April 16 2009, 4:46 PM BST

No I imagine its not but Don speaks with this air of authority and patronising tone and hasn't said what he bases this attitude on!

Maybe you should read the entire thread, Tom. I think I have explained things reasonably well.

I'd take a punt and say no. TO Eric Idle that is.

I've always though Steve Punt was Eric Idle's son, they're so similar.

Don - You'd say I'd be eaten alive, but my plan is make others think they're good so they don't improve, so I can go on and do better than them. Quite ruthless don't you think? :) And fashion was a far meaner and bitchier industry and than Tv and comedy and I survived that. :)

Quote: Dolly Dagger @ April 16 2009, 4:55 PM BST

And fashion was a far meaner and bitchier industry and than Tv and comedy and I survived that. :)

DRAMA QUEENS

This'll stop you fighting - well, sort of. Finish this. Add whatever dialogue or characters you like. Oh - poetic licence - it's a mixed prison.

__________________________________________________________________________________

INT. PRISON LIBRARY. DAY

ASSORTMENT OF PRISONERS ARE SAT ON DESKS. FAY MOUSRITER IS GIVING A LESSON ON SKETCH WRITING.

FAY:
Now then Sooty, what have you got? No double entendres please!

SOOTY HANDS FAY HIS SCRIPT

SOOTY:
More a change to my ususal style, half a page with out a gag is unusual for me.

DON:
Yeah, it's normally a full page without a gag.

SOOTY:
Maybe with out a good gag, but I sprinkle gags likes hundreds and thousands.

FAY:
(LOOKING AT SCRIPT) They don't seem to have landed here.

DON LAUGHS POINTING HIS FINGER AT SOOTY.

DON:
They landed down the shitter with all your other stuff!

SOOTY:
Oh yeah? Here's a good f**kin' gag ---

SOOTY ANGRILY RUSHES AT DON, PUTS ONE HAND OVER DON'S MOUTH AND PUNCHES HIM WITH THE OTHER.

Quote: Marc P @ April 16 2009, 4:56 PM BST

DRAMA QUEENS

Right I'll make the cocktails, if you start writing it... :)

Quote: Dolly Dagger @ April 16 2009, 4:55 PM BST

Don - You'd say I'd be eaten alive, but my plan is make others think they're good so they don't improve, so I can go on and do better than them. Quite ruthless don't you think? :)

That being the case, there's certainly a career waiting for you in TV, Dolly. :)

Quote: Morrace @ April 16 2009, 4:57 PM BST

This'll stop you fighting - well, sort of. Finish this. Add whatever dialogue or characters you like. Oh - poetic licence - it's a mixed prison.

__________________________________________________________________________________

INT. PRISON LIBRARY. DAY

ASSORTMENT OF PRISONERS ARE SAT ON DESKS. FAY MOUSRITER IS GIVING A LESSON ON SKETCH WRITING.

FAY:
Now then Sooty, what have you got? No double entendres please!

SOOTY HANDS FAY HIS SCRIPT

SOOTY:
More a change to my ususal style, half a page with out a gag is unusual for me.

DON:
Yeah, it's normally a full page without a gag.

SOOTY:
Maybe with out a good gag, but I sprinkle gags likes hundreds and thousands.

FAY:
(LOOKING AT SCRIPT) They don't seem to have landed here.

DON LAUGHS POINTING HIS FINGER AT SOOTY.

DON:
They landed down the shitter with all your other stuff!

SOOTY:
Oh yeah? Here's a good f**kin' gag ---

SOOTY ANGRILY RUSHES AT DON, PUTS ONE HAND OVER DON'S MOUTH AND PUNCHES HIM WITH THE OTHER.

FAY:
Alright settle down class. Dolly D is going to show us why it's called a cat walk.

DD FINISHES FILING HER VERY SHARP NAILS

Quote: Dolly Dagger @ April 16 2009, 4:59 PM BST

Right I'll make the cocktails, if you start writing it... :)

Done my bit!

Quote: don rushmore @ April 15 2009, 7:38 PM BST

I've worked in TV for a number of years, not as someone just sending off the occasional sketch but as an actual salaried employee - so I know a little about the industry.

Quote: don rushmore @ April 16 2009, 12:29 PM BST

If I told you my job , Marc, I'd completely blow my cover on here.
...I'm not here to make friends.

If you are involved in TV then please tell us in what capacity, I'm sure we will apologise profusely if you do know a lot more than us! Your not here to make friends, you don't write yourself, you seem to hate most stuff on here, why are you here?

Quote: don rushmore @ April 16 2009, 3:23 PM BST

People can post any old rot, and then sit back safe in the knowledge that their sketch or sitcom extract will be rewarded with sugary comments such as "Yeah, I quite enjoyed that, Sooty." regardless of whether the reader actually enjoyed it or not.

Sounds a bit arrogant. You don't post yourself, why are you on the forum? Are you a writer?
Also, as you said yourself, comedy is subjective and from my sitcom extract posted in critique you can certainly see it's not all sugary comments, just constructive.

Quote: don rushmore @ April 16 2009, 4:02 PM BST

A fine attitude to have in the amateur world, Dolly - but if you have that mentality as a professional, you will get eaten alive.

Again sounds a bit arrogant and that we are all wrong and should listen to you.

Quote: Marc P @ April 16 2009, 4:50 PM BST

I'd take a punt and say no. TO Eric Idle that is.

It's Michael Palin, isn't it? From the industrial peasants scene in Holy Grail?

Quote: Tom G @ April 16 2009, 5:04 PM BST

If you are involved in TV then please tell us in what capacity, I'm sure we will apologise profusely if you do know a lot more than us! Your not here to make friends, you don't write yourself, you seem to hate most stuff on here, why are you here?

Sounds a bit arrogant. You don't post yourself, why are you on the forum? Are you a writer?

And for a second time, Tom, I suggest you read the entire thread.

Quote: Marc P @ April 16 2009, 5:00 PM BST

FAY:
Alright settle down class. Dolly D is going to show us why it's called a cat walk.

DD FINISHES FILING HER VERY SHARP NAILS

Nice one. Thanks for trying, Marc P.

Quote: Tom G @ April 16 2009, 5:04 PM BST

If you are involved in TV then please tell us in what capacity, I'm sure we will apologise profusely if you do know a lot more than us! Your not here to make friends, you don't write yourself, you seem to hate most stuff on here, why are you here?

Sounds a bit arrogant. You don't post yourself, why are you on the forum? Are you a writer?
Also, as you said yourself, comedy is subjective and from my sitcom extract posted in critique you can certainly see it's not all sugary comments, just constructive.

Again sounds a bit arrogant and that we are all wrong and should listen to you.

Tom, he keeps saying you don't have to listen to him. And trust me working in TV doesn't qualify anybody to be right about their opinions - because it doesn't. Turn the TV on and see some of the decisions that have been made if you don;t believe me! When he said you were flogging a dead horse with the charity shop idea - he meant it I am sure in a constructive way. It was pithy yes, but he was just basically saying the idea had been submitted to death - which it has - and you might be better to look at some new formats in which to house your characters. It is extremely easy to find out how common a theme the Charity Shop is in unsolicited sitcom submissions to Television. Send an e-mail or make a phone call and it might help focus on whether to try and progress with it or try somthing else.

:)

Quote: Morrace @ April 16 2009, 5:16 PM BST

Nice one. Thanks for trying, Marc P.

Laughing out loud

Quote: don rushmore @ April 16 2009, 5:12 PM BST

And for a second time, Tom, I suggest you read the entire thread.

All you've said is that you work "in TV" that could mean anything

Quote: Marc P @ April 16 2009, 5:19 PM BST

When he said you were flogging a dead horse with the charity shop idea - he meant it I am sure in a constructive way. It was pithy yes, but he was just basically saying the idea had been submitted to death - which it has - and you might be better to look at some new formats in which to house your characters.

I appreciate that Mark and it was a comment that a few people made including yourself and I will perhaps change my focus, I just don't think that Don has a great attitude.

It also annoys me that he is going around making these comments like "having worked in TV for some years", "In the professional world" etc. I don't believe it.

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