British Comedy Guide

Four Yorkshiremen Page 2

How much?

Quote: Ray Dawson @ January 17, 2008, 10:35 AM

Houses and sheds? You lot don’t know you’re born. I was dragged up in a pallet, not a full pallet tha nos! Just a couple o bits o wood really. 12 on us under two bits o wood, I was so hungry once I had to eat me own leg! Chewed one of me brothers eyeballs for pudding. Nike trainers? We’d nowt like that. Clogs! That’s all we had, nor even a pair! Just the one. I’d eaten me left leg and t clog were right! It were a size 5 and I were a 7, I’d to let me brothers chew me toes off to make it fit. We didn’t complain, we were happy. We’d spend hours and hours playing hopscotch and havin three legged races, hide n seek, hide t’ clog! They were great times.

We didn't even have games we had to play "watch the paint dry", we'd spend hours finding paint that was wet just ta watch it dry!!!

And clogs! we didn't even have feet, we dreamed of avin feet!

and cannabalism after the first 2 months we couldnt even eat ourselves we had stumps for arms and legs and we just rolled around eating soil and trying to find wet paint to watch dry... mind you it's hard in an active volcano like!

Quote: Paul W @ January 17, 2008, 11:34 AM

We didn't even have games we had to play "watch the paint dry", we'd spend hours finding paint that was wet just ta watch it dry!!!

And clogs! we didn't even have feet, we dreamed of avin feet!

and cannabalism after the first 2 months we couldnt even eat ourselves we had stumps for arms and legs and we just rolled around eating soil and trying to find wet paint to watch dry... mind you it's hard in an active volcano like!

You lucky, ungrateful Bastard.

Stumps! STUMPS! You dont know you was concieved like. I wished I'd have had stumps. My parents were so poor they couldnt afford kids with stumps. We slid into the world a 6 week old aborted feotus. We were a blob of jelly. We would have to all bunch together to keep warm. And a Volcano. You were born with a silver spoon in your mouth boy. We lived in our mothers knickers. It stank to high heaven. You could watch paint dry too. You spoilt brat you. We were forced to watch our blobby bruvas & sisters go dry
Ungratefull Spoilt C**t.

I’m a cockney straight and narrow meself,
frog spawn and divan bed
within the sound of Bow’s flowery dells.
Once met one of them Yorkshire puddings
His mister beans had 4inch turn ups
His hinge and bracket was smothered with RAC and AA badges
He looked a right dildo
His good looks had obviously dribbled down his mother’s leg
He was definitely related to his struggle and strife before they were sam and harry’d
The dust bin lids looked like they had been invented by JK Rowling
I couldn’t elastic band an early bird the fridge freezer said
Why can’t everybody talk proper like what I does.

We dreamed of bein' cockneys. We used t'jizz onto our school blazers an' pretend they were pearly suits.

Laughing out loud

Quote: Aaron @ January 17 2008, 11:55 AM BST

My parents are rich, so I had the best upbringing of the lot of you.

I was so well brought up that I never performed a day's work in my life. Raised in a palace, I slept between silk sheets with female companions, whose beauty would make you weep with desire.

Didn't Marty Feldman and Tim Brooke-Taylor claim to have originally thought up this sketch?

Quote: catskillz @ April 12 2009, 3:05 PM BST

Didn't Marty Feldman and Tim Brooke-Taylor claim to have originally thought up this sketch?

On the Special Features of the At Last the 1948 Show DVDs, Tim Brooke-Taylor says all four of them (Cleese, Chapman, Feldman, Brooke-Taylor) co-wrote the sketch. Maybe it was conceived by Cleese/Chapman and then the others added bits.

Check this thread out from September 6, 2008:

https://www.comedy.co.uk/forums/thread/9100

'Bump' it?

Quote: Morrace @ April 12 2009, 5:19 PM BST

Check this thread out from September 6, 2008: https://www.comedy.co.uk/forums/thread/9100
'Bump' it?

Thanks Morrace, you're always useful for finding a reference (this is meant as a compliment).

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