British Comedy Guide

Jacqui Smith and the dodgy TV channel...

Written in just few minutes so is just a throwaway. I suspect the NewsRevue regulars have already swamped them with sketches of this story. :)

INTERVIEWER: Jacqui Smith, in addition to the recent revelations that you have claimed expenses for two pornographic movies, we also believe that you have a subscription to the digital TV channel 'Create & Craft'

JACQUI: It's a lie!

INTERVIEWER: Well, we have seen copies of your itemised bill for the last quarter which proves the sick minds that run in your family...

JACQUI: But it's not me...

INTERVIEWER: This is clearly an unhealthy addiction. Our research shows that you regularly watch shows on depraved topics such as stenciling, decoupage and rubber stamping with you partner Richard Timney.

JACQUI: Even if that was the case I wasn't in the house at the time. I spend my time at my regular address of the cupboard under the sink in the 6 bedroom mansion in our south London home watching reruns of the Antiques Roadshow on Freeview.

INTERVIEWER: Ha! A likely story.

JACQUI: It's true! The Additional Costs Allowance claim I put in for £24,006 last year was to help pay for our Virgin Media broadband, phone and TV bundle. You can't pin this all on me.

INTERVIEWER: So Mr Timney, your partner who runs your government office for £40k of public money per year, is completely to blame? The man who writes annonymous letters to newspapers in your constituency supporting your policies?

JACQUI: Um...yes.

INTERVIEWER: Oh...Is he in?

JACQUI: Yes, but you can't see him now as we've been watching a documentary on cross-stitch...

INTERVIEWER: A-ha! Gotcha!

JACQUI: Damn!

ENDS

I think personally that one shouldnt post something unless their 100 percent happy with it. "Throw away works" are just that.

Quote: LIME5000 @ March 31 2009, 3:06 AM BST

I think personally that one shouldnt post something unless their 100 percent happy with it.

Why? This bit is called 'critique' not 'my sketch is 100% perfect, wallow in its glory'.

if you care to give shit a critique, carry on with it my good man.

Oooooh, get her!

I know disgusting isnt it.

Quote: LIME5000 @ March 31 2009, 11:57 AM BST

if you care to give shit a critique, carry on with it my good man.

I love you LIME5000, I hope you know that

;)

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