SCENE1
A 1970s BEDROOM A LITTLE BOY IS IN BED HIS DAD IS READING HIM A STORY.
BOY
Daddy please don't make it scary, I don't like scary stories.
DAD
Don't worry son. When Farmer Giles got to his yard there were fathers and blood every where and it was all quiet.
BOY
Oh no dad who'd killed the poor chickens. Was it Brian Cough?
DAD
No son only one monster was that mean and horrible it was the cock gobbler!
BOY CRIES.
SCENE2
1980S LOUNGE THE SAME FATHER AND SON ARE WATCHING A BETAMAX VIDEO.
SON
Cor dad this Betamax video is ace I love being able to watch Metal Mickey anytime.
DAD
I got us a special video from my mate Dave down the market.
PUTS VIDEO INTO BETAMAX PLAYER.
2 MEN'S VOICES FROM THE FILM.
MAN1
This is a great piss I really enjoy pissing in a urinal. Hang on this urinal has teeth!
MAN2
It's the cock gobbler quick do up your flies....to late!
SOUNDS OF SCREAMS AND VIOLENT DEATH.
SCENE3
THE BOY IS NOW A MAN AND IS AT HIS WEDDING DAY WITH HIS LOVELY NEW WIFE.
BOY
I love you darling and finally I get to have sex!
WIFE
Yes darling would you like me to gobble your cock first?
BOY
Eeek the cock gobbler!
RUNS OFF IN TERROR
DAD JUMPS OUT OF THE CUPBOARD
DAD
Ha ha! Took 30 years but fooled you!