T&C (7on7 sketch)

Not using it elsewhere...

KARENMOANING, THROES OF PASSION) Oh, oh, Mark…

FXOOR OPENING

ROB:Hello, Karen, I'm home... Oh my god!

KAREN:Rob!

ROB:You're cheating on me?

KAREN:Well…

ROB:I don't believe it. Who the hell's this?

MARKAMERICAN) Hi, Rob. I'm Mark Zuckerberg.

ROB:Who?

MARK:Mark Zuckerberg, director and founder of Facebook. I thought I'd come round and do your wife. As you agreed to in the new terms and conditions.

ROB:The what?

MARKOn your Facebook account. The clause where by virtue of owning one, I'm allowed to come round and have sex with your wife.

ROB:I'm not sure I agreed to that.

MARK:It's a standard clause.

FXOOR OPENS

MOTHER:Hello, Mark, here's the cookies you wanted…

ROB:Mother?

MOTHER:Rob!

ROB:What are you doing here?

MOTHERh, this is awkward.

MARK:I'm sorry, Rob, but you're not technically her son any more.

ROB:Not her son?

MARK:Well, you signed her away in the agreement too.

MOTHER:You must have been awfully keen to play Scrabulous dearie.

MARKh, I've had enough of this.

FXHONE DIALLING

MARK:What are you doing?

ROB:Calling my lawyer.

FXHONE RINGS, ON DISTORT. IT IS PICKED UP.

VOICEON PHONE, DISTORT) Hello, Mark Zuckerberg's lawyer, how can I help you?

ROBSWITCHING OFF PHONE) Oh for crying out loud, you've got him too!

MARK:Rob, I own a very popular internet site. If people want to use it, then it's only fair they grant me free rights to everything they possess, physically and intellectually, all photos, documents, money, belongings, personal information, family and friends. Until the end of time. What's morally objectionable about that?

ROB:Get out of my house!

MARK:My house.

ROBh my god.

MARK:My God.

ROB:I'm leaving.

FXOOR RATTLES.

ROB:Mark… why have you locked the door?

MARK:I'm afraid I don't just own the right to have sex with your wife. You really didn't read that user agreement carefully, did you?

Very nice.

Terrific punchline!

Would have thought you commissioned RFTPers were pretty much guaranteed a place in that 7 on 7 workshop. I keep forgetting different readers/script editors/producers have different senses of humour. Of course, if you ARE going (as you haven't said you're not) then well done.

Anyway, damn good sketch. Could do with a tiny bit of cutting (think Rob's "You're cheating on me?" line is a bit well, duh) but great otherwise.

Very nice much enjoyed!

The main theme of this very funny sketch is that Rob blindly clicked 'I Agree' without reading the terms and conditions. Right - this is shown by Zuckerberg having sex with Rob's wife. Very funny! However, the lines involving Rob's mother and lawyer, although funny, are a repeat of the same joke and not really necessary. Brevity is a good selling point. The final punchline, though is a brilliant, unexpected twist! Here's how I see it:-

KAREN: (MOANING, THROES OF PASSION) Oh, oh, Yes! Yes!…

FX: DOOR OPENING

ROB: Hello, Karen, I'm --- Oh my god!

KAREN: Rob!

ROB: I don't believe it. Who the hell's this?

MARK: (AMERICAN) I'm Mark Zuckerberg.

ROB: Mark Zucker - who?

MARK: Mark Zuckerberg, director and founder of Facebook. I'm doing your wife. As you agreed in the new terms and conditions.

ROB: The what?

MARK: Your Facebook account. The clause whereby virtue of owning one, I'm permitted to have sex with your wife.

ROB: I'd never agree to that!.

MARK: Rob, you clicked, 'I Agree' - to granting me free rights to everything you possess, physically and intellectually, all photos, documents, money, belongings, personal information, family and friends. Until the end of time. What's morally objectionable about that?

ROB: Get out of my house!

MARK: My house, Rob.

ROB: I'm off to the police station. We'll see what they have to ---

FX: DOOR RATTLES.

ROB: Why have you locked the door?

MARK: I don't just own the right to have sex with your wife, honey. You really should have read the user agreement....
.

I quite liked the "My God" as well. Shame to lose it.

Great idea, and well executed, but maybe a little long?

I particularly liked the punchline

I think you could lose the mother and lawyer bit, but the My God line has to stay. Very nice sketch though.

Quote: Yacob Wingnut @ March 7 2009, 2:02 PM GMT

Would have thought you commissioned RFTPers were pretty much guaranteed a place in that 7 on 7 workshop. I keep forgetting different readers/script editors/producers have different senses of humour. Of course, if you ARE going (as you haven't said you're not) then well done.

View original

Oh I'm not. I didn't even get the 'encouraging' email.

Which just goes to show that no-one should be too dispirited about this. It's all about specific readers/producers and individual tastes. If you didn't get through, there's always next time...

I like the idea of the sketch -- it's excellent. However, it is too long and I think Morrace is right about the brevity; the joke is a bit battered over the head to hit home and you only need to do it once.

Agree with the 'My God' line -- that was awesome!

Dan

Interesting - you see, I tend to feel that it needs repetition to turn it into a sketch, rather than an idea. The shorter version feels under-developed to me.