Quote: David Bussell @ February 19 2009, 1:49 PM GMTThat'll put the willies up him.
Why was everyone gay in the early 90s?
How do I get my work colleague to shut up? Page 2
Quote: Paul W @ February 19 2009, 1:51 PM GMTWhy was everyone gay in the early 90s?
We couldn't afford unwanted pregnancies.
Quote: chipolata @ February 19 2009, 1:48 PM GMTMove your desk a foot every day. Soon you'll be far enough way not to be bothered by him.
Even better move HIS desk. He will get the hint when he has to work in the carpark 
You could always send his desk to his house by courier, like Jim says he did to Dwight in the Office. A lot of effort, but he's bound to get the message. Either that or give him a profound kicking after work.
Oh my, I recently allowed a local artist to use some studio space I have extra. I am suffering with the same problem. He will not shut up. I like him as a person but when I am working I do not want to hear or see him. He goes on and on about politics and his broken relationships.
What I have done is this. I asked him to not talk to me because it ruins my thought process. I had him share with me what music he likes and have adjusted the background music for his taste. That has enhanced my taste in being more worldly in music. He still slips up from time to time but all he has to do is see me grit my teeth up and he shuts up. 
Another option is to have your desk phone on speed-dial on your mobile. Every time he starts talking, ring your desk phone.
Or develop the disconcerting habit of staring just over his left shoulder with a slight frown whenever he talks to you.
Quote: Dr Mato @ February 19 2009, 3:03 PM GMTOh my, I recently allowed a local artist to use some studio space I have extra. I am suffering with the same problem. He will not shut up. I like him as a person but when I am working I do not want to hear or see him. He goes on and on about politics and his broken relationships.
Can't you put some sort of voodoo hex on him? I assume your tribe specialises in that kind of thing? 
Quote: chipolata @ February 19 2009, 3:33 PM GMTCan't you put some sort of voodoo hex on him? I assume your tribe specialises in that kind of thing?
*snigger*
Shove your penis in his mouth. However if he starts sucking on it you are in trouble. But at least he won't be talking.
Quote: chipolata @ February 19 2009, 3:33 PM GMTCan't you put some sort of voodoo hex on him? I assume your tribe specialises in that kind of thing?
That would be plan B.
Roofie in the watercooler?
Quote: roscoff @ February 19 2009, 4:36 PM GMTShove your penis in his mouth. However if he starts sucking on it you are in trouble.
Trouble? A boy-mouth is just as good as a girl-mouth for that kind of thing, surely?
Quote: chipolata @ February 19 2009, 4:42 PM GMTTrouble? A boy-mouth is just as good as a girl-mouth for that kind of thing, surely?
It's the visual aspect that ruins it for me although a strategically placed curtain or blanket may solve that problem.
If a guy has long hair does that help?
What if he's bald like Alan C? You could have a lovely girls face tattooed on his scalp...anybody got Alan's phone number?