Look, I done a sketch!

I threw a little paddy and deleted this post.

Welcome.

I think that works well Woodmeister. Clearly not that topical though, as you say. Dialogue is nice and would work in a sitcom too. nice first entry.

I like it Woodmeister

- it strikes me as being more geared for radio than TV and I know there's visual work in there, but nonetheless the dialogue would flow well on the old wireless - have you considered playing around with the lines, "Rabid Ape" and "Paper Zoo"....not change them exactly, but expand on them a bit - what I mean is, when you have a hard consonant sound at the end of the first word that leads into a soft sound at the start of the second, it gives you a chance to play around with misunderstandings - shit example but "Rabid Ape - Rabbi Dape" - I'm not really sure what my point is, but that just crossed my mind as I read it.

Actually, I think the heroin is kicking in a bit now so maybe best to ignore that last point. I'm just going to - nope didn't make it...on the floor now

I threw a little paddy and deleted this post.

Hi WoodMeister

Concept is good. Personally I think this would be better as an advert (on radio) where, rather than brainstorming, just use all the points you've made as selling features. An enthusiastic voiceover and screams/shouts in the background around the key points would come across really well, I'd expect.

Just a thought.

Dan

Hello again.

And to T o m

Well done!

I threw a little paddy and deleted this post.

Could this be expanded into a sitcom. It's very 2D. I think a short/advert is a good idea.

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Hey, forget about it being an advert (on radio) with screams/shouts in the background. Forget about the sketch being expanded into a sitcom - because I think it would make a sensational --- MUSICAL!!

Yes! Here's the lyrics for your opening number, "I Can't Be An Architect"

I can't be an architect
So now I hate them all!
Lovin' those do-gooders now
My back's against the wall

Fat architects are rabid apes
They make me wanna wretch
But why'd I have to tell you?
It's obvious from my sketch!
.

I threw a little paddy and deleted this post.

I really liked it, it tickled my tickly bits. I love the idea of these pompous arseholes wanting to get rid of the paupers by whatever method possible.