British Comedy Guide

The Flower show Page 2

Thanks for your feedback David.

I found episodes 1 and 4 harder to write as they have to introduce the setup, and then resolve their relationship at the end. The way I saw it was that episode 1 was the first act so a resolution wasn't needed. But I see what you mean and I will have a think how I can avoid the slightly cop-out ending.

The second and third episodes do have a better self-contained plot structure. E.g. In episode 2 one of Rodney's petals falls out, he thinks his life as a show flower is over, Daisy fixes it by giving him a "comb-over". But coming up with stories where something actually happens would be tough as it is.

The more I think about Lee's idea the more I like it. If this series goes well I will try and expand the universe. I was trying to move away from just writing two-hander sketches but I may have inadvertantly written another one!!

Shoepie, your idea for this is pure genius. A flower waking up and finding another in the pot... Brilliant. However the script is shit.

This is a couple in a bed story - and you need dialogue to reflect that. Arguments over space, snoring, who's getting the most sunlight etc. I also think you need to alternate the flower shots with root shots as well.

A: There's some moisture there, between one of your vestigial roots - d'you want that?"

B: I was thinking of absorbing it later, why?

A: No reason. (BEAT) Hot in here isn't it.

B: It's a greenhouse.

A: Dry...

B: Go on then, have it if you want it!

Etc..

Quote: Godot Taxis @ January 27 2009, 12:31 PM GMT

However the script is shit.

*resists urge for comeback*

Ok Godot take it easy...

Quote: Godot Taxis @ January 27 2009, 12:31 PM GMT

Shoepie, your idea for this is pure genius.

Thanks.

Quote: Godot Taxis @ January 27 2009, 12:31 PM GMT

However the script is shit.

Haha, okay, I'll make it less shit.

Quote: Godot Taxis @ January 27 2009, 12:31 PM GMT

This is a couple in a bed story - and you need dialogue to reflect that. Arguments over space, snoring, who's getting the most sunlight etc. I also think you need to alternate the flower shots with root shots as well.

Yeah I think there should be some of that, but I want to focus on having a story arc of them slowly becoming friends. So it's a lot to cram into 90 second episodes which is what I'm aiming for.

Quote: Godot Taxis @ January 27 2009, 12:31 PM GMT

A: Hot in here isn't it.

B: It's a greenhouse.

I did like that.

Thanks for reading.

People who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones
And we're living in a glass house.

Quote: sootyj @ January 28 2009, 10:16 AM GMT

People who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones
And we're living in a glass house.

I think I'm going to have to relocate them to a Greenhouse so I can steal all these jokes!

You're full of shit
Yes so am I we're coverded in fertiliser lovely isn't it.

Share this page