Hedgehog

INT. KITCHEN. DAY

SON BURSTS INTO KITCHEN FROM GARDEN.

SON:
(OVER EXITED) Mum, mum. There's a hedge hog in the garden!

MUM:
Ah. Why don't you take it some bread and milk darling?

MUM PREPARES BREAD AND MILK. SON WHIZZES OUT, THEN RETURNS WITH MILK AND SOGGY BREAD DRIPPING DOWN HIS FACE.

SON:
He said, have you got anything stronger?

MUM PEERS OUT OF THE GARDEN WINDOW. A TRAMP WEARING A SONIC THE HEDGE HOG MASK, SWIGGING A CAN OF SPECIAL BREW, IS STUMBLING AROUND.

SONIC:
Arrrrggggghhhhhhh. Heh, heh. You're me best mate. [PUKES UP, THEN PEGS IT]

END

Excelent, a clever funny sketch that certainly caught me out.

nice. Just two things, you might want to call the "son" child - I had a teenager in my mind and I assume you mean a kiddy!

Also, is "He said, have you got anything stronger?" the best line? Doesn't sound right considering the kid was assaulted...would "he wants beer" or something be more apt?

Thanks Sooty. Bought a Sonic mask so can film. For me, it's missing something. The sketch, not the mask. Wonder whether, at the end, the eyes (mother and Sonic Tramp's) meet. Some quick cuts between the two. Then a chase sequence, ending in a deserted decayed area where hundreds of other Sonics emerge - make it as 'horroesque' as possible. Then a final twist/ joke.

You could have him running up the street to the music picking up tab ends.

Or maybe the husband comes home and he's Mario and they scrap?

Quote: Pete @ December 17 2008, 4:51 PM GMT

nice. Just two things, you might want to call the "son" child - I had a teenager in my mind and I assume you mean a kiddy!

Also, is "He said, have you got anything stronger?" the best line? Doesn't sound right considering the kid was assaulted...would "he wants beer" or something be more apt?

View original

Thanks Pete. And yup; it's a kiddy. Agree that line is cumbersome. 'He wants a beer' is better.

I liked it.

You could have the tramp running around the garden where cans of special brew are strategically placed and have the 'ring' sound when he finds/collects them.

Quote: Nigel Kelly @ December 17 2008, 4:56 PM GMT

I liked it.

You could have the tramp running around the garden where cans of special brew are strategically placed and have the 'ring' sound when he finds/collects them.

View original

Think you're onto something there.......probably extend the can picking up out onto the street with Sonic Tramp falling all over the place. A little graphic totting the cans picked up (with the ring noise). And maybe the reveal at the end, that it's a couple of kids playing a new game for the Wii called Sonic Tramp. One controlling the tramp, the other the mother. What do you reckon?

I think you could have one kid playing 'Sonic Tramp'. I'm not sure that you need another one unless the mother is chasing the tramp.

The kid could also be dressed as a tramp and playing it under a railway bridge or in a cardboard box but maybe that's taking it a bit far. Still, it sounds like a good sketch.

Quite good.

One point, wasn't 'Your me best mate' the catchphrase of the character 'The Brown Bottle' from Viz magazine?

Def.

Quote: Deferenz @ December 17 2008, 5:19 PM GMT

Quite good.

One point, wasn't 'Your me best mate' the catchphrase of the character 'The Brown Bottle' from Viz magazine?

Def.

View original

Really? Don't remember that being his catch phrase. Lots of people say it (in an ironic way) when a couple of shandies down? Maybe as a result of the strip. Hmmmmmmm.

Shouldn't this be the dad?

Oh and I liked it.

Good one. Think it is fine as is.