Quote: Ned1984 @ December 12 2008, 8:52 PM GMTSperm whales are called sperm whales because......
No one dares call them c**ts.
Tag Line/Punch Line Thingy Page 8
I don't know....but we seem to have lost the CHRISTMAS thread here chaps.... let me try to get us back on track:
Tiny Tim sat on Scrooge's knee and declared:
Quote: Blobster @ December 13 2008, 2:57 AM GMTTiny Tim sat on Scrooge's knee and declared:
That because of the credit crunch Bob Cratchitt was prepared to accept a 10% pay cut.
The principal boy was a strapping young lady but...
Quote: Timbo @ December 13 2008, 10:36 AM GMTThat because of the credit crunch Bob Cratchitt was prepared to accept a 10% pay cut.
The principal boy was a strapping young lady but...
she was Thai, so, in principle, she was a boy. The Dame was a hermaphrodite and the pantomime horse looked like a camel, what was going on there I shudder to think. Still, the kids seemed to like it and the credit crunch didn't affect Mother Pigeon at all.
Santa's going to IKEA because......
He should have gone to Specsavers.
He knew he was at the wrong Christmas party when?
Quote: steve @ December 13 2008, 1:07 PM GMTHe knew he was at the wrong Christmas party when?
...the hostess wished him happy Hanukkah
When I told the wife I had bought her something naughty for Christmas she did not expect...
Quote: Timbo @ December 13 2008, 7:12 PM GMT...When I told the wife I had bought her something naughty for Christmas she did not expect...
... a talking Russell Brand Vibrator.
Santa's favourite sitcom is........ because.........
Quote: Blobster @ December 16 2008, 2:15 PM GMT... a talking Russell Brand Vibrator.
Santa's favourite sitcom is........ because.........
Santa's favourite sitcom is Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps. Because he's a c%^t.
What did Rudolph say to the Little Match Girl?
Quote: Antrax @ December 16 2008, 2:20 PM GMT
What did Rudolph say to the Little Match Girl?
I'll give you a f**king match - your arse, my face.
What's the difference between Santa Claus and the Virgin Mary?
Quote: john lucas 101 @ December 16 2008, 2:23 PM GMTWhat's the difference between Santa Claus and the Virgin Mary?
Once can squeeze down tight chimneys, the other has a chimney that is a tight squeeze.
The Angel of the Lord surprised the shepherds while they were....
... hot lunching behind the stables.
Beverley had an unusual stuffing recipe for the turkey, ...
Dan
Quote: swerytd @ December 16 2008, 2:57 PM GMTBeverley had an unusual stuffing recipe for the turkey, ...
...but as she surveyed the wreck of her kitchen she conceded that the popcorn may have been a mistake.
Santa's toy factory shop is closed due to industrial action...
... as the elves have complained that 4mph is too fast a pace to keep up.
I had to have turkey for 14 days solid after Christmas. The turkey curry and turkey soup were okay but, frankly, we went too far when...
Quote: swerytd @ December 16 2008, 3:29 PM GMT... as the elves have complained that 4mph is too fast a pace to keep up.
I had to have turkey for 14 days solid after Christmas. The turkey curry and turkey soup were okay but, frankly, we went too far when...
..I threw up in the turkey cornflakes.
Scrooge was amazed as he exited the time machine in 2008, gazed at the throng of Christmas shoppers on Regent Street and ..........
was asked if could spare any change.
To save money, Mrs. Claus made the Christmas Pudding...