British Comedy Guide

What stuff do you write other than comedy? Page 4

I occasionaly write Christmas cards and birthday cards and the occasional irate letter.

I can't imagine writing anything other than comedy. If I started writing a drama, I'd inevitably start adding funny lines, and it would soon become a full on comedy.

Quote: catskillz @ December 13 2008, 4:45 PM GMT

I can't imagine writing anything other than comedy. If I started writing a drama, I'd inevitably start adding funny lines, and it would soon become a full on comedy.

Things I think are normal my helper laughs at. So in the end I will imagine I shall have to wear a point hat but shall money in the bank and stuff. :$

Quote: Dr Mato @ December 13 2008, 5:11 PM GMT

Things I think are normal my helper laughs at. So in the end I will imagine I shall have to wear a point hat but shall money in the bank and stuff. :$

Whaaaa????

Quote: David Chapman @ December 13 2008, 5:37 PM GMT

Whaaaa????

HUH?

I used to write songs, thinking I was gonna get into music...

...but being over 25, I got no chance!

So, instead....

I write ALL genres.

I want to be an all-rounder.

Only thing I HAVEN'T tried is a play... yet!

Quote: Dolly Dagger @ December 13 2008, 4:16 PM GMT

I write poetry that is sad and I don't show it to anyone. Except I think I put my poem about Dennis Waterman on a message board last.

I had to look him up. Turns out he was that blonde haired fellow that got stuck in "Scars of Dracula"! I LOVE Hammer vampire movies :D

I wrote a poem of homage to Herbert West, it's in Critique. It's inspired by the dog with grafted parts from the Re-Animator sequel. There's something about a dog with a hand that grips one's imagination.

Quote: Little Jersey Devil @ December 14 2008, 8:19 AM GMT

I had to look him up. Turns out he was that blonde haired fellow that got stuck in "Scars of Dracula"! I LOVE Hammer vampire movies :D

I wrote a poem of homage to Herbert West, it's in Critique. It's inspired by the dog with grafted parts from the Re-Animator sequel. There's something about a dog with a hand that grips one's imagination.

You should share this poem Jersey.

Quote: Dr Mato @ December 14 2008, 10:13 AM GMT

You should share this poem Jersey.

https://www.comedy.co.uk/forums/thread/10446
There it is, such as it is ;)

Also, WIKI had that Dennis Waterman was a victim of Dracula, I was thinking about it and that's wrong. He was the lead.

Quote: Little Jersey Devil @ December 14 2008, 8:19 AM GMT

I had to look him up. Turns out he was that blonde haired fellow that got stuck in "Scars of Dracula"! I LOVE Hammer vampire movies :D

I wrote a poem of homage to Herbert West, it's in Critique. It's inspired by the dog with grafted parts from the Re-Animator sequel. There's something about a dog with a hand that grips one's imagination.

I love Hammer Horrors too. My poem was more about Waterman's invaluable contribution to TV drama.

I actually found my poem. And I'd just like to stress that (as will be clear) that it was written in one go, in about two minutes. Maybe not even that long.

Dennis Waterman of All Seasons

Dennis with your hair,
so very fine and sandy,
your kipper ties,
and skate wing collars,
that made you quite the dandy,
First as a child star
(you were an early starter)
Then as a gritty hero,
You were born to play George Carter.

But in the next role,
you played an absolute blinder,
as ex-boxer and Fulham fan,
in ITV's Minder.
You often got the stripper
as Terry McCann,
who was George Cole's side-kick
and ultra straight man.

In She-Devil you had naughty scenes,
as the adulterous Bobo,
I must admit you weren't great
but hey it was a job...Oh
Denny, Denny, Denny
(may I call you that?)
you're now doing that cop thing,
which looks a bit like tat.

I just don't like it,
- not because I'm a meanie -
but because the only cop show I really like's
The Sweeney.

Do you think I should send it to him?

Quote: Dolly Dagger @ December 14 2008, 10:57 AM GMT

I love Hammer Horrors too. My poem was more about Waterman's invaluable contribution to TV drama.

I actually found my poem. And I'd just like to stress that (as will be clear) that it was written in one go, in about two minutes. Maybe not even that long.

Dennis Waterman of All Seasons

Dennis with your hair,
so very fine and sandy,
your kipper ties,
and skate wing collars,
that made you quite the dandy,
First as a child star
(you were an early starter)
Then as a gritty hero,
You were born to play George Carter.

But in the next role,
you played an absolute blinder,
as ex-boxer and Fulham fan,
in ITV's Minder.
You often got the stripper
as Terry McCann,
who was George Cole's side-kick
and ultra straight man.

In She-Devil you had naughty scenes,
as the adulterous Bobo,
I must admit you weren't great
but hey it was a job...Oh
Denny, Denny, Denny
(may I call you that?)
you're now doing that cop thing,
which looks a bit like tat.

I just don't like it,
- not because I'm a meanie -
but because the only cop show I really like's
The Sweeney.

Do you think I should send it to him?

Send it, I tell ya!

Do you think I should send it to him?[/quote]
I laughed Laughing out loud But the "tat" might sting a bit. But then, I don't really know the Waterman.....

oo we are sharing poetry, here is one of my especially bad ones, but I'm kind of fond of it, obviously written when Mr Blair was PM

Free Cheese.. by Daniel J. Banks

Free Cheese said Tony,
Cheese for all,
A cheer went up
A joyous call.

The opposition was stunned
They didn't foresee
The PM giving
All cheese for free

The dairy farmers
Were up in arms
Who would pay
To upkeep their farms

Ted he misheard
But in his own way obeyed
And released the Edam
He kept in a cage

The Cabinet were stunned
They didn't advise
And really weren't sure
this move was wise

Supermarkets panicked
No sure what to do
Shut up the shutters
And locked the doors too

Tony continued
Till he deemed it fit
To say he was joking
And didn't mean it

No harm done eh?

Quote: dannyjb1 @ December 14 2008, 11:03 AM GMT

oo we are sharing poetry, here is one of my especially bad ones, but I'm kind of fond of it, obviously written when Mr Blair was PM

Free Cheese.. by Daniel J. Banks

Free Cheese said Tony,
Cheese for all,
A cheer went up
A joyous call.

The opposition was stunned
They didn't foresee
The PM giving
All cheese for free

The dairy farmers
Were up in arms
Who would pay
To upkeep their farms

Ted he misheard
But in his own way obeyed
And released the Edam
He kept in a cage

The Cabinet were stunned
They didn't advise
And really weren't sure
this move was wise

Supermarkets panicked
No sure what to do
Shut up the shutters
And locked the doors too

Tony continued
Till he deemed it fit
To say he was joking
And didn't mean it

No harm done eh?

:D

Well, it ain't cheesy Pleased

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