Trapped

Re-edit:

EXT. WOODS – DAY

A RAMBLER STROLLS THROUGH THE FOREST.

SUDDENLY, A STEEL TRAP SNAPS SHUT ON HIS ANKLE.

RAMBLER:
Jesus Christ!

HE DROPS TO THE GROUND IN AGONY.

A WOMAN WITH A BRIGHT BLUE JACKET AND CLIPBOARD EMERGES FROM BEHIND A TREE – A CHUGGER.

CHUGGER:
Can I just get a moment of your time, sir?

RAMBLER:
Get help! Call an ambulance!

CHUGGER:
I'm talking to you today on behalf of Free the Bears. It's a very worthy charity.

RAMBLER:
I don't care, I have to get out of here!

CHUGGER:
Surely you can spare five minutes of your lunch break for charity, sir?

RAMBLER:
I'm not on a lunch break!

CHUGGER:
Great! Now did you know, sir, that every year around four hundred bears in India are captured from the wild and forced into the dancing bear trade?

RAMBLER:
Trapped like me you mean?

CHUGGER:
Exactly like you, sir.

RAMBLER:
Wait… did you do this? Is this your trap?

CHUGGER:
Yes it is, sir.

RAMBLER:
But why?

CHUGGER:
Because - and I'm trusting you'll donate generously for my candour here - a tungsten steel, forty pound, spring-loaded bear trap with offset jaws makes for a much more colourful demonstration than a couple of laminated photos of distressed bears in fezzes.

RAMBLER:
You… you… arggghh!

CHUGGER:
I can see you're on board so I'm going to fill out the top bit of the form for you now. Where's my pen got to? (PADS HERSELF DOWN) Just bear with me. Get it? Bear? Little joke there (SHE FINDS HER PEN AND BEGINS TO WRITE). Okay, today's date… the twenty fourth of October. You're a mister, obviously! Now if I can just get your first nam…

SHE LOOKS DOWN BUT THE MAN HAS VANISHED. THERE'S ONLY THE TRAP LEFT NOW. AND A GNAWED-OFF FOOT.

CHUGGER (CONT):
(TUTTING) Chewed through his own ankle. How rude!

THE RAMBLER IS SOME DISTANCE AWAY CRAWLING ACROSS THE GROUND, TRAIL OF BLOOD IN HIS WAKE.

A BEAR ENTERS THE FRAME NEXT TO THE CHUGGER WEARING A LITTLE FEZ.

CHUGGER (CONT):
Go get your lunch then.

THE END

Hahaha. Not bad but maybe you could change it from bears to something else, like wolves. The Mtichell & Webb sketch about the 'Free the Mad Bears' charity popped into my head.

Quote: Afinkawan @ December 12 2008, 10:57 AM GMT

Hahaha. Not bad but maybe you could change it from bears to something else, like wolves. The Mtichell & Webb sketch about the 'Free the Mad Bears' charity popped into my head.

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How did that sketch go?

Very good I love that he chewed his own foot off.

Shades of Kids in the Hall canoist sketch.

Nothing like yours. It was David Mitchell doing a charity appeal to free the mad bears, who had been captured and made to dance but had gone insane in captivity. Then the follow up sketch was a campaign to recapture the mad bears as they were mad and eating people.

Quote: sootyj @ December 12 2008, 11:04 AM GMT

Very good I love that he chewed his own foot off.

Shades of Kids in the Hall canoist sketch.

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Right! I knew I'd seen something like that done before but I couldn't place it. Of course it was KITH!

Quote: Afinkawan @ December 12 2008, 11:08 AM GMT

Nothing like yours. It was David Mitchell doing a charity appeal to free the mad bears, who had been captured and made to dance but had gone insane in captivity. Then the follow up sketch was a campaign to recapture the mad bears as they were mad and eating people.

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Okay, I don't know that one. Was it Look or Sound? Different enough anyway I think. Besides, wolves just aren't as entertaining as bears. Unless they're mod wolves.

Good work Dave, my instinct would be to make it darker and more insidious as the sketch went on (direction and acting wise). Good, good.

I enjoyed it.
What would you think of the bear doing a little dance at the end, like he's trained to do & the chugger says "No time for that now, your lunch will get cold." Or something like that.

Quote: Little Jersey Devil @ December 13 2008, 9:30 AM GMT

I enjoyed it.
What would you think of the bear doing a little dance at the end, like he's trained to do & the chugger says "No time for that now, your lunch will get cold."

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I think it's very good indeed and intend to steal it at once.

Loved this sketch.

Thanks, Kevin. It's taken a new direction now thanks to an ongoing collaboration but I appreciate your kind words all the same.

Now I think a bit more about it... It did remind me of a radio skit, from Blue Jam, I think, about the incredibly dull woman who has to engineer hideous traffic accidents in order to meet people. Julia Thingy played the woman, I think.

People still reading this old thing? Pah! Pah, I say!!

Quote: Kevin Murphy @ December 16 2008, 2:58 PM GMT

Now I think a bit more about it... It did remind me of a radio skit, from Blue Jam, I think, about the incredibly dull woman who has to engineer hideous traffic accidents in order to meet people. Julia Thingy played the woman, I think.

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Julia Davis. I sort of see what you mean but the new direction will leave no doubt as to whether this is a knock-off Jam sketch or not.