2 TERRORIST BASTARDS HAVE SOME HOSTAGES
TERRORIST1
Ha ha prepare to die, we're heartless terrorist bastards.
CAPTAIN OLD FASHIONED GAYNESS RUNS ON.
CAPTAIN
Ok chaps let's stop this naughtiness, for I am Captain Old Fashioned Gayness.
TERRORIST1
Captain gayness? Eek I surrender don't fruit me up!
TERRORIST2
I surrender to, I don't want to catch gayness.
CAPTAIN
No I'm Captain Old Fashioned Gayness, as in having a happy, gay old time. I bought some party poppers and jelly.
TERRORIST1
Poppers and KY jelly? Even Batman's not as degenerate as you.
TERRORIST2
He just dress's up in rubber and hits you, actually that is a bit dodgy.
CAPTAIN
Stop it, I'm not gay, well I am....I bought us a Waitrose picknick some veggies and a salami. You could eat my sausage whilst I toss your salad.
TERRORIST1 PUTS HIS GUN IN HIS EAR.
TERRORIST1
Call the police or I'm blowing my brains out.
POLICE COME ON AND ARREST THE TERRORIST BASTARDS.
TERRORIST2
Thank you officer he was going to touch me up.
CAPTAIN
Was not! I'm gay not gay, I'm just happy.
SENIOR POLICE OFFICER TALKS TO CAPTAIN
SENIOR
Well done Captain Big Girl's Blouse and here's your reward.
GRABS CAPTAINS EARS AND GIVE'S HIM A HUGE WET SNOG.
SENIOR
You like it don't you bitch.
