Cause I am awake and this board appears to be full of geeky boys and hapless blokes, I thought here should be an educational thread on the opposite sex by the ladies of the forum. If you want to do a male version go ahead but "Don't block the TV" can only go so far .
I'll start.
THINGS YOU SHOULD NEVER DO TO A WOMAN.
1) Approach a woman in a club and ask about her more attractive friend. Even troggs have feelings.
2) Flirt with a woman you really want to sleep with then when you realise she ether isn't that kind of girl or shows she wants a bit more, ignore her and behave like a jackass. That is just cruel.
3) Tell your mates all the sordid details of your sex life. No we do NOT talk about you too, Sex and the city lied to you.
4) Cheat.
5) Dump by text.
6) Call her fat or ugly in a fit of anger. You can never take this back fully and she will always remember those words.
7) Lie about your hobbies. Sooner or later we will figure out you don't like classical music when we see your crappy Ministry of sound annuals.
8) Eat her chocolate bar even if she says it's okay. She is just being nice.
9) Lovingly refer to her as Hippolina.
10) Get caught dressing up in her BEST expensive underwear. The cheap stuff is okay.
11) Dutch oven her. That is where you fart in bed then hold her under the cover.
12) Leave a pause when she asks "How do I look"?
13) Arrive on her doorstep at 3am with a bag of chips in one hand and the neighbours flowers in the other.
14) Walk her best friend home.....and leave her to get the bus.
15) When asked "Do you fancy her" and you do, laugh madly and gawf "Naaaaa, are you kiding?". Do you REALLY wonder why she when off with your mate instead.
16) Delete her "I wub you pookie" messages off facebook and myspace. I know it's embrassing as hell but she will only get paranoid you are having an online affair with SeXy_AnGeL.
17) Ask if it's her time of the month.
18) Recoil at the sight of a pack of tampax in your bathroom. No one is going to think they are for you!
19) Make her pay for a date. This actually happened to a friend of mine.
20) Hit. Ever.
21) Be stand offish for the sake of "Treat em mean....". Men who say that don't get laid very often.
Any ladies want to add to this?