Quote: dyingtolive @ November 13, 2006, 11:59 AMbeddy_boy what did u choose as the other sketch for the second round (which sketch did you pick from the pilot)?
For the second round I picked The Archivists and was actually fairly pleased with it.
How about yourself?
Quote: beddy_boy @ November 13, 2006, 12:02 PMHow about yourself?
interactive soap, the pilot i struggled with cus i found it hard listening to it, i really didnt like a lot of it, i would like to read your train announcment if you feel like posting it
Quote: dyingtolive @ November 13, 2006, 12:45 PMi would like to read your train announcment if you feel like posting it
After struggling with the other two second round sketches my train annoucement was a very quick after-thought - here it is anyway.
PLATFORM QUICKY
FX
LATFORM TANNOY BONG
PLATFORM ANNO: (D) I’m sorry to announce the 7.42 train to Hogwarts Station has been delayed by approximately 1 hour and 20 minutes; this is due to an epic battle further along the line between the dark forces of Lord Voldermort and a young bespectacled boy wizard.
We apologise for any inconvenience this might cause to your journey.
Quote: beddy_boy @ November 13, 2006, 1:02 PMFX
PLATFORM ANNO: (D) I’m sorry to announce the 7.42 train to Hogwarts Station has been delayed by approximately 1 hour and 20 minutes; this is due to an epic battle further along the line between the dark forces of Lord Voldermort and a young bespectacled boy wizard.
We apologise for any inconvenience this might cause to your journey.
yeah that was alright, i think it was hard to write a bad one of these so i would like to have known how they judged them
Quote: dyingtolive @ November 13, 2006, 1:08 PMyeah that was alright, i think it was hard to write a bad one of these so i would like to have known how they judged them
I agree it was hard to write a bad one. As with most of the pilot I didn't find the station annoucements very funny. I didn't actually think mine was particularly funny but it seemed to fit in with the show's style/format.
Thanks for the feedback everyone. I'm glad that it got at least one laugh. The God/jesus thing should have gone.
Hi
Just found this forum so sorry my feedback's late!
Upholsterer
I really did like your sketch. Thought it was a very good idea. It did feel like it was going on a bit too long at a certain stage and could maybe have been re-written a couple more times before submission. Not sure whether it does/doesn't fit the style of the show (you'll have to ask the producers).
Beddy-Boy
Though your sketch was funny and entertaining, it struck me as the main character being the same bloke that read 'The Real News' in the pilot. Was that the brief or just a coincidence.
It did seem to die a death before the end and, like you say, it could do with a second character. You could have done with Nadia the cleaner coming in and exposing him as the same bloke -- may have been a nice twist.
Thanks
Dan
Quote: swerytd @ November 27, 2006, 11:51 AMHi
Just found this forum so sorry my feedback's late!
Upholsterer
I really did like your sketch. Thought it was a very good idea. It did feel like it was going on a bit too long at a certain stage and could maybe have been re-written a couple more times before submission. Not sure whether it does/doesn't fit the style of the show (you'll have to ask the producers).
Beddy-Boy
Though your sketch was funny and entertaining, it struck me as the main character being the same bloke that read 'The Real News' in the pilot. Was that the brief or just a coincidence.
It did seem to die a death before the end and, like you say, it could do with a second character. You could have done with Nadia the cleaner coming in and exposing him as the same bloke -- may have been a nice twist.
Thanks
Dan
Cheers Dan! Really useful & constructive feedback and I really like your idea for the twist at the end of mine.
Yeah I also thought it seemed a bit too similiar to the Real News podcast.
I just hope there'll be another sketch writing opportunity soon cos I've definitely learnt a lot from the sketch factor experience and the feedback i've got.