Toilet

INT. DAY. WORK TOILET.

CAMERA ON MAN IN CUBICLE READING A PAPER. SOMEONE ELSE COMES INTO TOILETS AND BOLTS DOOR ON OTHER CUBICLE.

SFX MOBILE PHONE RINGING.

MAN: (O.O.V.) Hello baby, oh yeah, you know what I like, uh, uh. That's it, oh f**k yeah. I can't wait. Getting' close now baby. Keep talkin', keep on talkin, oh yeah, nearly there baby. Yess!

SFX TOILET ROLL BEING USED.

MAN: (O.O.V.) Yeah, sure.

MAN IN CAMERA SHOT SEES PHONE BEING PASSED UNDERNEATH TO HIS CUBICLE.

MAN: (O.O.V.) Jim, its your missus.

ENDS.

Laughed out loud, Nigel. Excellent: short, sharp, sweet.

Yeah, very very funny.

Nice one especially the lack of explanation.

Funny and confident.

I'm going to have to disagree and say that the lack of explanation ruined it for me.

How did the guy know who was in the cubicle next to him?

Well, maybe he saw him (Jim) go to the toilet before him since they are at work.
Ok, that wasn't explained but for the purposes of the sketch I don't think I needed to define that. But hey, if some people liked it I'm happy.

Quote: Chris Forshaw @ September 1 2008, 5:32 PM BST

the lack of explanation ruined it for me.
How did the guy know who was in the cubicle next to him?

View original

'Cos there was a 'Glory Hole' there.

Part Two:
________________________________________________________________________________

MAN IN CAMERA SHOT (JIM) SEES PHONE BEING PASSED UNDERNEATH TO HIS CUBICLE.

MAN: (O.O.V.) Jim, it's your missus.

CUT TO JIM IN THE NEXT CUBICLE. HE IS SITTING DOWN WITH HIS TROUSERS ROUND HIS ANKLES AND A STONKIN' GREAT HARD-ON. HE TAKES PHONE FROM UNDERNEATH.

JIM: Cheers...

JIM: (INTO PHONE) 'Ello darlin'... (LISTENS) Oh, yeh, he loved it, didn't he? Must have shot a couple of weeks' worth! (LISTENS) D'you reckon? Yeh, I don't see why not - I'll give it a whirl. Are you listening? Good....

JIM PUTS PHONE INTO HIS TOP POCKET, MAKING SURE THE AUDIO PART OF IT IS EXPOSED.

CUT BACK TO MAN IN NEXT CUBICLE. HE IS DOING UP HIS TROUSERS WHEN TO HIS HORROR AND DISBELIEF, HE SEES JIM'S MASSIVE NINE-INCH COCK THROBBING AT HIM THROUGH THE 'GLORY HOLE'IN THE WALL.

MAN: (BACKING AWAY) What the FUCK?!

JIM: (O.O.V.) It's for you!

________________________________________________________________________________

Quote: Chris Forshaw @ September 1 2008, 5:32 PM BST

I'm going to have to disagree and say that the lack of explanation ruined it for me.

How did the guy know who was in the cubicle next to him?

View original

Well I suppose you could have one line, or a distinctive fart give the identity of one of the partys away.

Quote: Morrace @ September 2 2008, 3:09 AM BST

'Cos there was a 'Glory Hole' there.

Part Two:
________________________________________________________________________________

MAN IN CAMERA SHOT (JIM) SEES PHONE BEING PASSED UNDERNEATH TO HIS CUBICLE.

MAN: (O.O.V.) Jim, it's your missus.

CUT TO JIM IN THE NEXT CUBICLE. HE IS SITTING DOWN WITH HIS TROUSERS ROUND HIS ANKLES AND A STONKIN' GREAT HARD-ON. HE TAKES PHONE FROM UNDERNEATH.

JIM: Cheers...

JIM: (INTO PHONE) 'Ello darlin'... (LISTENS) Oh, yeh, he loved it, didn't he? Must have shot a couple of weeks' worth! (LISTENS) D'you reckon? Yeh, I don't see why not - I'll give it a whirl. Are you listening? Good....

JIM PUTS PHONE INTO HIS TOP POCKET, MAKING SURE THE AUDIO PART OF IT IS EXPOSED.

CUT BACK TO MAN IN NEXT CUBICLE. HE IS DOING UP HIS TROUSERS WHEN TO HIS HORROR AND DISBELIEF, HE SEES JIM'S MASSIVE NINE-INCH COCK THROBBING AT HIM THROUGH THE 'GLORY HOLE'IN THE WALL.

MAN: (BACKING AWAY) What the FUCK?!

JIM: (O.O.V.) It's for you!

________________________________________________________________________________

View original

Visions of Buzby the BT chicken with a huge yellow dinkle shall chase sleep from me for some time.

Quote: sootyj @ September 2 2008, 3:15 AM BST

Well I suppose you could have one line, or a distinctive fart give the identity of one of the partys away.
Visions of Buzby the BT chicken with a huge yellow dinkle shall chase sleep from me for some time.

View original

Yes, Sooty, I agree - we MUST have full explanations!

"The Adventures of Buzby the BT Chicken With a Huge Yellow Dinkle"

Cumming soon in a bookshop near you....

Could be worse could be Maureen Lipman with a huger dinkle.

Is this a new form of eortica?

Unloved BT icons with enromous doodles assaulting people in toilets.

Hi Nigel,

There are two fundamental problems that stop this working for me.

1. As already mentioned - how does the guy know Jim is next door? If you started the sketch with both of them in their cubicles already it would be easier to buy that the Man knows Jim is next door.

2. Why is he flogging one off in the office toilet anyway? Or rather, why is he being so loud about it? Switch it to a pub/nighclub toilet and your sketch will be a lot more believable.