Here are my selection of BSG members football team.
Goalkeeper-
Sooty.
I've never met you Soots but you do describe yourself as a 'large'. So I'm going for a width thing there.
Flat pack four-
IKEA Roscoff Skibbington Frankie Rage
Nasty miserable bastards. And you always need at least one Scandinavian in defence.
Sweeper-
Aaron
He'll be trying to pick up all the mistakes and I've stuck him on his own in the corner with his night vision goggles.
Midfield-
Ellie Zooo Scatterbrained Ruby
They can just wander about a bit and talk about shoes and how gay men are great. Should link well with the sweeper.
Striker-
Leevil
Lazy bastard.
Water boy-
Chapman
Player Manager-
Finck
Bring her on for the penalties.
First aid- Graham Bandage.
Subs-Ian W, Ellies Tits, Gavin, Griff.
Probably only use Ellie's tits there.
All our home matches would be played in Charlie's Vagina. Smelly but spacious.