http://petermusgrove.com/2008/08/11/woman-has-200-orgasms-a-day/
Decided to lampoon an article I read in the News of the World.
Woman has 200 Orgasms a day.
That's very good, and as ever nice style.
It's a bit to long, and the journalist flirtng breaks the sense of dsibelief.
NW articles are wonders of brevity, I think they cut the Georgian conflict to 150 words.
It's good as it is. But I think it really comes alive wehn you focus on the library stuff, and how people have helped her.
I like this.
I wish I was her!
"N of the W articles are wonders of brevity, I think they cut the Georgian conflict to 150 words". Like it Sootyj
More like a caption competition.
And thanks again..Some slight editing has occurred.
http://petermusgrove.com/2008/08/11/woman-has-200-orgasms-a-day/
Believe me, original article is surprizingly long for news of the screws.
I'm assuming she's a librarian...?
You might want to mention that right at the beginning. Otherwise the frequent library mentions sort of come out of nowhere.
Quote: zooo @ August 11 2008, 3:44 PM BSTI'm assuming she's a librarian...?
You might want to mention that right at the beginning. Otherwise the frequent library mentions sort of come out of nowhere.
"Then it would happen after sex. I'd be thinking about what we'd done in bed and I'd start feeling a bit flushed, then I'd become aroused and usually end up climaxing loudly again. This was OK if I was still at home but if I was at work it could cause problems. On the plus side the library had never been so busy with men coming as far away as Littlehampton to register."
This paragraph is supposed to hit the reader with the sudden revelation that the woman is a librarian.Also to conjure up an image of a librarian making loud orgasmic noises.
In your view does it not make it clear enough ???.
Well, I saw the mention of work in the second read through.
I definitely didn't get that it was supposed to be a revelation though.
Could just be me?
Well possibly the word revelation is a bit strong...A comedic realisation perhaps....
Anyway on your suggestion sootyj I have made it a tad shorter.
http://petermusgrove.com/2008/08/11/woman-has-200-orgasms-a-day/
And have changed the TV program she has an orgasm with to 'Cheggars plays pop' rather than 'Last of the summer wine' which will really sort out the 40 something's
It's still too long Pete. I agree with zoo about the Library thing. It appears to come out of nowhere. The subheadings creased me the most.
Nice one.