British Comedy Guide

Pope Test

THE POPE IS TALKING TO A CARDINAL.

POPE

Hey I get in the Pope-mobile today, and she not start, is a she broken?

CARDINAL

What did you do?

POPE

I yell, hey I am the Pope drive me somewhere.

CARDINAL

Ah the Pope-mobile is fine, we sacked the driver.

POPE

Why you do a stupid thing like that?

CARDINAL

So you can have driving lessons.

POPE

Why the Pope need driving lessons, I'm the Pope.

CARDINAL

Well the Italian courts just gave a man half a million Euros, because he failed his test because he was gay. The Vatican needs the money, do the test and convince the instiructor your gay.

POPE

How will I do that?

CARDINAL

Well just wear your big purple robes, and ask him to kiss your ring.

POPE

You sure? It got very awkward when I tried that with Goerge Bush,

Sorry Sooty, this one is a bit confusing for me. For a start, the Pope's German isn't he? So the cod Italian doesn't work. And the relatively obscure reason for the gag isn't introduced early enough for me to do anything other than say: "what's going on?"

The punchline is okay, but maybe it's just a one-liner gag that you've overstretched?

THE POPE IS TALKING TO A CARDINAL.

POPE

Is the Pope-mobile broken, it won't start?

CARDINAL

What did you do?

POPE

I yell, I am Pope Benny drive me somewhere.

CARDINAL

Ah the Pope-mobile is fine, we sacked the driver.

POPE

Why do a stupid thing like that?

CARDINAL

So you can have driving lessons.

POPE

Why does Pope Benny need driving lessons, I'm the Pope.

CARDINAL

Well the Italian courts just gave a man half a million Euros, because he failed his test because he was gay. The Vatican needs the money, do the test and convince the instructor your gay.

POPE

How will I do that?

CARDINAL

Well just wear your big purple robes, and ask him to kiss your ring.

POPE

Oh what the hell I'll just bring my boyfriend, that should do it.

The submitted version, thanks for all the feedback.

Yes, the edited version is much better. Nice one.

Agree and Sooty excels with the rewrite. :D

Thanks, as ever the Slag fro Del Monte says yes,

Hooray!

I think the rewrite works better but the last line seems a bit superfluous ... the laugh is with the 'kiss my ring' presumably?

Maybe, I kinda like a subpunch, especially with the rumours of Benny being good with colours, a fan of The Wizard of Oz, a frequnet visiter to Hebdon Bridge via Hampstead Heath, a homosexual.

Quote: sootyj @ July 18 2008, 1:12 AM BST

Maybe, I kinda like a subpunch, especially with the rumours of Benny being good with colours, a fan of The Wizard of Oz, a frequnet visiter to Hebdon Bridge via Hampstead Heath, a homosexual.

Now who's having a go at minorities?

More the colourful use of eupehemism, your sense of humour seems a tad narrow at times.

And frankly Benny as a homophobe, whose been all but outed, is a fair target.

I suppose I should lay off Gordy Brown, as even lying, incompetent PMs have feelings.

Quote: sootyj @ July 18 2008, 1:17 AM BST

More the colourful use of eupehemism, your sense of humour seems a tad narrow at times.

F**king pots and kettles! Laughing out loud

I have no idea what you mean, seriously I don't.

By the way try and keep your discussions within the same thread.

Quote: sootyj @ July 18 2008, 1:24 AM BST

I have no idea what you mean, seriously I don't.

By the way try and keep your discussions within the same thread.

Sorry if I'm not keeping thread etiquette.

I'm sure Aaron will discipline me - or get his lieutenant zooo to do it for him.

Why not give an opinion on the skit?

Otherewise I'd be happy to set up a
"famous people you thought were racist but weren't thread,"

Quote: Morrace @ July 18 2008, 1:45 AM BST

'Pots and kettles'

The phrase "Pot calling the kettle black" is an idiom, used to accuse another speaker/writer of hypocrisy; in that the speaker/writer disparages the subject for a fault or negative behaviour that could equally be applied to him or her.

Did the talking dictionary join the forum while I was away?

I liked the rewrite but didn't see a major problem with the original to be honest.

Quote: David Chapman @ July 18 2008, 1:50 AM BST

I'm sure Aaron will discipline me - or get his lieutenant zooo to do it for him.

You forgot someone Angry

*cracks whip*

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