British Comedy Guide

Fight!!!!

Okay, I initially thought this was a childish thing to ask about, but then I realised it might have real comedy value. So, do you remember your first fight, or a particularly memorable fight you've had? If not, maybe you once watched a funny/memorable fight. Personally, I can count the number of proper fights I've had on one hand, and none of them were particularly memorable.

When I was 19, I was meeting my boyfriends fmaily for the first time. So I'd got all dressed up nicely. Anyway - I was about to leave when my sister decided to pick and argument with me...we ended up having a hair pulling fight and then she punched me on my cheek. Within 10 minutes I had the biggest shiner and had to go and meet the whole of my boyfriend's family. Luckily I borrowed some sun glasses which covered most of it.

That was Rubes.

I've never been in a proper fight. Although I fought in Karate tournaments for about 8 years and have been on both sides of an ass-kicking many times.

Quote: EllieJP @ July 15 2008, 10:07 AM BST

When I was 19, I was meeting my boyfriends fmaily for the first time. So I'd got all dressed up nicely. Anyway - I was about to leave when my sister decided to pick and argument with me...we ended up having a hair pulling fight and then she punched me on my cheek. Within 10 minutes I had the biggest shiner and had to go and meet the whole of my boyfriend's family. Luckily I borrowed some sun glasses which covered most of it.

Women! Rolling eyes

The only thing I can really think of was at school one lunch time, in one of the computer rooms. I can't remember exactly what happened, but this extremely fat kid, a bit smaller than me, basically jumped up on my back and wrapped his arms around my neck. In a kind of strangle-attempt, not some kind of ill-advised hug.

ANYWAY.

Unfortunately for him, I am built quite stockily (I was always being asked to join the school rugby team), so although annoying and a bit of a shock it didn't hurt or drag me down or anything, and I was much more powerful than he was. So I just ran backwards, bashing him into walls, desks, a pillar that was in the middle of the room, etc. He let go before long.

Fun times, fun times.

Most of my fighting has been at karate classes/tournaments many years ago. However, the one fight that stopped me getting picked on in school was fun. For whatever reason, the supposed 'hardest kid in school' decided to try to beat me up. I have no idea why, perhaps he felt threatened because I was learning karate.

Anyway, I wasn't in the mood for a fight. He started pushing me then when I didn't react, he took a swing at me which I easily dodged. When he took another one I knocked him on his arse with a footsweep. He got up, took another swing and landed on his arse again from a virtually identical footsweep. By this time the manadatory crowd had gathered to watch me knock him on his arse a third and fourth time. Finally he gave up and ran away with everyone pissing themselves laughing at him as I hadn't even bothered taking my hands out of my pockets.

Oddly I never had any more problem with bullies at that school and when I arrived at high school I already had a reputation for being 'hard' and never got into a fight there either. Which was nice as I hate fighting.

Haha - I'm glad you stood up for yourself.

When I used to box, I never used to tell anyone, because I didn't want people thinking I thought I was hard. I knew though, if someone did try and fight me, they'd have no chance.

I was damn hard! ;)

Quote: Afinkawan @ July 15 2008, 10:55 AM BST

Most of my fighting has been at karate classes/tournaments many years ago. However, the one fight that stopped me getting picked on in school was fun. For whatever reason, the supposed 'hardest kid in school' decided to try to beat me up. I have no idea why, perhaps he felt threatened because I was learning karate.

Anyway, I wasn't in the mood for a fight. He started pushing me then when I didn't react, he took a swing at me which I easily dodged. When he took another one I knocked him on his arse with a footsweep. He got up, took another swing and landed on his arse again from a virtually identical footsweep. By this time the manadatory crowd had gathered to watch me knock him on his arse a third and fourth time. Finally he gave up and ran away with everyone pissing themselves laughing at him as I hadn't even bothered taking my hands out of my pockets.

Oddly I never had any more problem with bullies at that school and when I arrived at high school I already had a reputation for being 'hard' and never got into a fight there either. Which was nice as I hate fighting.

Afinkawan, Afinkawan, Does whatever Afinkacan.

Just like your first kiss, your first fight sticks in your memory forever. The first fight I ever had, was when I was 10. It was the Easter holidays, and my Dad took me and my sister to stay with his Auntie, in this little Welsh village, in the middle of nowhere, for about 5 days. While we were there, we got talking to a family from Nottingham, who were also staying with relatives. They had a 12-year-old son, called Neil, and I spent most of the trip hanging out with him. As he was 2 years older than me, and was in Senior school, he was pretty cocky, e.g. he told me that, although his name was Neil, people called him "Nail", because he was "so hard"! Anyway, on the last day, we were messing around, wrestling on some grass, and he pushed me to the ground, in a way that I considered to be a tad ungentlemanly. Annoyed, I jumped to my feet, and, to his, and my surprise, I expressed my chagrin by punching him. It was almost like an out-of-body experience, because up until that moment, I'd only ever seen people punch each other on T.V. After a couple of seconds of initial shock, he started fighting back, and I received my first ever fists to the face. I had no idea how my body was going to react to this new experience, but luckily adrenaline was about to take over, and I held my own, for at least 30 seconds of full on fist rain, before his extra size and experience became too much for me to handle, and I dropped my fists, and admitted defeat. We eventually both burst out laughing about the whole thing, and 5 minutes later, we were getting along as if nothing had happened. Aah, great days.

As I said, not funny in the slightest.

Awww that's a cool story. :)

Quote: Griff @ July 15 2008, 11:11 AM BST

I'm never getting into an argument on this board again. It's full of shit-kicking mentalists.

Be a lover, not a fighter. Cool

I have never received nor dealt punches. Go me.

The only punches I have ever thrown have been on the rugby pitch. Perfectly acceptable behaviour, there is no bullying, all parties are willing participants and the 'winner' (if one needs to be identified)is decided over several beers in the club house afterwards.

Rugby, the model for a model society.

Quote: EllieJP @ July 15 2008, 11:02 AM BST

Haha - I'm glad you stood up for yourself.

When I used to box, I never used to tell anyone, because I didn't want people thinking I thought I was hard. I knew though, if someone did try and fight me, they'd have no chance.

I was damn hard! ;)

No, I didn't tell anyone either, for pretty much the same reason. People at school found out 'cos someone saw me through the window of the leisure centre.

I did have a good non-fight once though. I was getting a bit good at the old karate and our instructor started teaching a couple of us how to use the bo stick. I was on my way to class one night, wandering down a dark alley in a decidedly dodgy part of town when someone stepped out of the shadows and said they were going to kick my head in and steal my money. I clunked my staff on the floor and said, "You're welcome to try." He did a comedy double-take and legged it. that was definitely lucky because there was no way I'd have been able to use a 6-foot staff in a 3-foot wide alley Laughing out loud

I had one fight when I was 15. It was with a sixth former called Karl who called my girlfriend a slag. It was the only time I've ever truly lost my rag and I got medieval on his ass.

Oh and my ex once punched me in the face several times during a nasty argument. I still have the scars. Young love!

Quote: Afinkawan @ July 15 2008, 11:46 AM BST

I clunked my staff on the floor and said, "You're welcome to try." He did a comedy double-take and legged it. that was definitely lucky because there was no way I'd have been able to use a 6-foot staff in a 3-foot wide alley Laughing out loud

I dream of being able to be that cool! Awesome.

Quote: Perry Nium @ July 15 2008, 12:17 PM BST

.

Oh and my ex once punched me in the face several times during a nasty argument. I still have the scars. Young love!

My ex accidently punched me in his sleep giving me a swollen lip. It caused all sorts of problems. My friends kept pulling me aside and asking me if I was "okay" while glancing nervously at my lip. Didn't help my boyfriend was a boxer. Hmm... Oh and when we were training together I managed to totally miss the punch bag and punched him out on to the floor... ooops.

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