Oi lay off critique! Most of us learning our way, and sitcom, infact any lenghty work of comedy is very difficult.
Snide remarks in other threads, is a great way of putting people off.
You don't have to read any of it.
Also those who use this forum, who are more able writers. Why not help us all, by showing us some example of your craft?
Quote: sootyj @ June 30 2008, 5:02 PM BSTOi lay off critique! Most of us learning our way, and sitcom, infact any lenghty work of comedy is very difficult.
Snide remarks in other threads, is a great way of putting people off.
You don't have to read any of it.
Also those who use this forum, who are more able writers. Why not help us all, by showing us some example of your craft?
I'm just addressing Marc P's 'that line needs to be funny'. He's right, it does. Every three lines needs to be funny - that's a fact.
And why is that not a valid critique? It needs to be funnier - that's just as valid as 'that needs to be more character driven'.
I don't have to post work, as there's no law to say 'To critique you must post your own work as a comeback if people don't like it'.
Quote: Griff @ June 30 2008, 5:09 PM BSTSeefacts, for someone who is a writer, you repeatedly show a remarkable lack of understanding that how you phrase something is every bit as important as what you say. Your subtext is not generally subtle or well hidden.
I'm listening, as Frasier used to say.
Quote: Griff @ June 30 2008, 5:10 PM BSTThat is all I have to say.
That's helpful.
I just get really frustrated reading the sitcoms in Critique simply because I want to read something that makes me laugh.
I just think if you've got something negative to say.
1 Leave it in the specific thread.
2 Be constructive, and not generic.
3 Respect that even the least funny thread, is work some one put effort into. And deserving some respect, even if you point out how it could have been improved.
Quote: sootyj @ June 30 2008, 5:14 PM BSTI just think if you've got something negative to say.
1 Leave it in the specific thread.
2 Be constructive, and not generic.
3 Respect that even the least funny thread, is work some one put effort into. And deserving some respect, even if you point out how it could have been improved.
Okay, then I shall apologise if I put anyone's noses out. Believe it or not, it wasn't my intention (yeah, yeah! etc)
There's been an avalanche of sitcoms of late - which I do like looking at because there's just too many sketches to read at times - but it's just hard to keep addressing the same issues.
No worries, I've had my nose put out of joint more often than a boxer with very short arms.
Quote: Seefacts @ June 30 2008, 5:16 PM BSTOkay, then I shall apologise if I put anyone's noses out. Believe it or not, it wasn't my intention (yeah, yeah! etc)
There's been an avalanche of sitcoms of late - which I do like looking at because there's just too many sketches to read at times - but it's just hard to keep addressing the same issues.
Half the reason I keep my mouth shut in Critique now...
Shit
Quote: sootyj @ June 30 2008, 5:02 PM BSTAlso those who use this forum, who are more able writers. Why not help us all, by showing us some example of your craft?
I know of some critiqueing type forums that ask that you critique some work of others before posting some of your own. Maybe some people are taking that approach.
Quote: Seefacts @ June 30 2008, 5:16 PM BSTit's just hard to keep addressing the same issues.
Not really, just identify an example in the particular text that highlights the point.
Can I direct everyone to Marc P's masterful edit of the opening scene, third post on page 3. As crits go, close to perfection. Specific, and highlighting where the scene actually hinges and can be improved upon. Much food for the noggins.
I'd love to read some early scripts from established writers - were they as far from what would get on TV as these we see here?
Did Gervais write much before Golden Years or did he just leap straight in with that?
I suppose my question is - are there examples of people that "learnt" this craft or did they all have hints of greatness from the off?
Pity there are no producers on here who can say "yes, i've worked on scripts that sucked but we turned around" or not - i know Ash Atalla said The Office was the most complete script he had ever seen and needed little work - natural talent or years of practice and improvement?
I suppose 'The Office' needed little work after they'd spent a year working on it. But I think that's what people should do. Take however long it takes and get it right. I know I'd kick myself if I saw my work on screen and knew I could do so much better.
Re: Marc's analysis, I think it's terrific that an experienced writer has gone through Timbo's script like that. Where else would you get that done for free?
A question for Marc though, I think I read somewhere on these pages that you're doing or have done a sitcom script. How much harder is it than writing for a soap?
Quote: David H @ June 30 2008, 10:47 PM BSTA question for Marc though, I think I read somewhere on these pages that you're doing or have done a sitcom script. How much harder is it than writing for a soap?
Hi David,
I will swim against the tide here probably and say it is a lot easier to make someone laugh on television than make them cry. I try and do both in my writing.
Usually I get them the wrong way round.