British Comedy Guide

Fishy Kippers

I had grilled kippers for lunch in my office and the plate is still on my desk next to the keyboard. The skin is still on it and it smells so disgusting, it's actually making me gag everytime it wafts up my nostrils.

And yet, four times I've sat at this desk tonight, and each time I've resisted taking the plate downstairs to be washed.

Why? Why am I torturing myself with this unholy ming? I think it may be the same syndrome as when you get dog shit on your hand and then can't stop smelling it all day, even though each time you're repelled.

Anyone got any thoughts?

Answers on a postcard to "Clean That Fishy Plate You Filthy F**king Bastard", Grimsby Harbour, PO Box 123.

Perhaps laziness. Although I don't know how to account for the fact that you enjoy the smell of dog shit on your hands. Your on your own there pal.

:S

Quote: Curt @ May 28 2008, 2:28 AM BST

Perhaps laziness. Although I don't know how to account for the fact that you enjoy the smell of dog shit on your hands. Your on your own there pal.

I didn't say I ENJOY the smell. I said I felt a compulsion to constantly sniff it while it's there.

Perhaps you were a fly in a past life. They like shit. Wait...were you the one who said the new Indy film was good? This would explain much.

Quote: Perry Nium @ May 28 2008, 2:43 AM BST

I didn't say I ENJOY the smell. I said I felt a compulsion to constantly sniff it while it's there.

Ah - like touching the wall with a "wet paint" sign on display

Quote: Badge @ May 28 2008, 3:02 AM BST

Ah - like touching the wall with a "wet paint" sign on display

Ahhh, yes, like 'touching your winkle' when you are told it's naughty! Oooo, good idea, I'm off: Well, not quite but hopefully will be in a short while.

P.S. Badge WTF are you doing up at 3.02am you nut!
:D

P.S Thing - what the hell are you doing up at 3.44am?!?!?!?! :O

You're all nutters!

Quote: Perry Nium @ May 28 2008, 2:21 AM BST

I think it may be the same syndrome as when you get dog shit on your hand and then can't stop smelling it all day, even though each time you're repelled.

Does this happen often? Is yours a particularly good looking dog?

Ellie, what the hell are you doing up at 10.04am?

Ummm... I'm at work! haha I don't just hang around my house all day posting on here.

Quote: David Bussell @ May 28 2008, 10:07 AM BST

Does this happen often? Is yours a particularly good looking dog?

Actually it hasn't happened since I was a kid. But I still remember the strange compulsion to sniff.

*Update: The plate is now cleaned and the office has returned to its natural state.

Now if only I can bring myself to shift that dead tramp in the corner.

Quote: EllieJP @ May 28 2008, 10:12 AM BST

Ummm... I'm at work! haha I don't just hang around my house all day posting on here.

No, your hang around your office all day posting on here!

And I don't know how anyone can stand the smell of fresh fish, let alone nasty skanky old fish. Sick

Quote: Perry Nium @ May 28 2008, 10:57 AM BST

Now if only I can bring myself to shift that dead tramp in the corner.

Okay okay - I'll leave. No need to call me a dead tramp... I haven't died... I just haven't washed for about 12 years.

Quote: Aaron @ May 28 2008, 11:17 AM BST

No, your hang around your office all day posting on here!

Yep! Pleased

Quote: EllieJP @ May 28 2008, 11:18 AM BST

I just haven't washed for about 12 years.

This I can confirm.

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