Sitcom Sketch: Going through the motions

SC1-FACTORY CANTEEN -DAY

LIGHTS FADE UP TO REVEAL A TABLE AND TWO CHAIRS. BRI ENTERS, HE'S DRESSED IN OVERALLS AND SITS DOWN AT ONE OF THE CHAIRS. BRI IS PLAYED A FAMOUS ACTOR WHO HAS STARRED IN SOME PREVIOUS SUCCESSFUL SITCOMS

BRI:
Bumholes!

FX______________________________GALES OF CANNED LAUGHTER

BRI DRUMS HIS FINGERS ON THE TABLE. HE'S WAITNG FOR SOMEBODY. HE STANDS UP FOR A MOMENT AND SCRATCHES HIS ARSE THROUGH THE OVERALLS.

FX_______________________________BREAKING WIND.

FX_______________________________MORE GALES OF CANNED LAUGHTER

BRI:
Ooops! Better lay off the beans methinks!

FX_______________________________GALES OF CANNED LAUGHTER

BRI:
Blimey that was close

FX_______________________________TITTERING AND A LONE COUGH

DOOR OPENS AND DAVE APPEARS. HE'S BEING PLAYED BY AN EQUALLY FAMOUS SITCOM STAR.

FX_______________________________CANNED LAUGHTER GOES INTO MELTDOWN

DAVE:
Wotcher Bri? Is this on after the watershed?

BRI:
Yeah I think so mate.

DAVE:
OK cool! I can say f**k then and there'll be no problem.

FX________________________________CANNED LAUGHTER GOES BONKERS

BRI:
Yeah nice one Dave. F**k and shit! Eh? What about that?

FX________________________________CANNED LAUGHTER GOES BONKERS

DAVE:
Exactly mate. F**k, shit and for good measure...waaaaaaaankerrrr!

FX________________________________CANNED LAUGHTER GOES BONKERS

BRI:
Wot you gettin' for this pal?

DAVE:
Zillions pal!

FX________________________________CANNED LAUGHTER

BRI:
Me too. F**king great ain't it?

FX________________________________CANNED LAUGHTER

DAVE:
Right that's enough swearing for the moment. It's time to introduce a sort of surreal non-plot sort of plot thing that the writer hopes is funny. It relies solely on our big name status to carry it through. So get ready to do plenty of your trademark funny stuff as the script is woeful.

BRI:
Triffic. Now we've made it to the top we can do any old shit and we can be arrogant enough to believe that the public is so thick that it'll lap it up. Blinding

FX______________________________CANNED LAUGHTER GOES MENTAL

END:

lol!! Sounds a little bitter I liked it, I'm as equally disillusioned and bitter lol

Wasn't this the adult version of Friends?

Wot me bitter?

No way Jose.....

Well maybe just a bit

I suppose it's just what I find myself thinking every time I see something new by people who ought to know better. Too many talented people seem to be going through the motions and it's just more irritating than bitter-making.

We seem to be expected by programme makers to adopt the Emperor's New Clothes approach and assume that as it's by who it's by, then it must be good.

Well I for one ain't buying! See? See?

And I'm not going mad right? Right?

Worrrrrrrrahahaha!

Quote: Blenkinsop @ April 22, 2007, 7:45 PM

We seem to be expected by programme makers to adopt the Emporor's New Clothes approach and assume that as it's by who it's by, then it must be good.

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Can't agree with you more on that statement Blen - some woeful stuff being written and acted out by some talented people in the last few years.