Car wash sketch.

MULTI STOREY CAR PARK. INT. DAY.

THE CAR PARK IS DESERTED. A MAN APPROACHES HIS CAR, UNLOCKS IT AND CLIMBS INSIDE. HE PUTS THE KEYS IN THE IGNITION AND IS ABOUT TO START THE ENGINE WHEN A BEAUTIFUL YOUNG WOMAN APPEARS FROM NOWHERE AND BEGINS WIPING A SOAPY SPONGE ON THE WINDSCREEN.

MAN ( AGITATED )
No, no its fine honestly. I haven’t got time.

HE LOOKS AT THE WOMAN AGAIN AS SHE SMILES SEDUCTIVELY DOWN AT HIM WHILE SCRAPING AWAY THE SOAP SUDS. HE SMILES BACK AS HE REALISES HOW ATTRACTIVE SHE IS AND WINDS DOWN THE DRIVERS WINDOW.

MAN ( LAUGHING )
Ok, ok, how much is it?

THE MAN BEGINS SEARCHING IN HIS POCKET FOR SOME CHANGE. WHEN HE LOOKS UP AGAIN AND IS SURPRISED TO SEE 4 MENACING LOOKING MEN HAVE NOW APPEARED WITH SCRAPERS, AND ARE GRINNING DOWN AT HIM AS THEY HELP THE WOMAN SCRAPE THE SOAP SUDS FROM THE WINDSCREEN. THE WOMAN MOVES TO THE DRIVERS WINDOW AND HOLDS OUT HER HAND.

MAN ( WORRIED )
Erm, how much is it?

WOMAN.
£20 please.

MAN ( SHOCKED )
£20?

HE LOOKS AT THE MEN AS THE SLOWLY FINISH WIPING THE WINDSCREEN, AND REACHES FOR HIS WALLET.

MAN
Yes, yes of course.

HE HANDS HER A £20 NOTE.

MAN ( FORCING A SMILE )
Seems very reasonable.

Not so much a comedy sketch as nightmare image of inner-city Britain.

kjs

it'd be better if it ended up as £20 for each person

Not really a joke is it?

This is a good sketch. i guess you have to be me, and be able to visualise the 4 men who have appeared from nowhere and are manically smiling down at the man as they clean the windscreen.
Which i suppose is a critique problem. Unless the sketch posted is gag related or its hard to appreciate the writers vision.

But trust me, in my head the canned laughter is almost tangible. I'll guess i'll just have to keep persevering until you all eventually manage to catch up.

Quote: M Lewis @ April 27 2008, 6:00 PM BST

Not really a joke is it?

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You never like anything. Ever!!!

I liked the sketch. Agree with Bushbaby on the £20.

Agree with both M Lewis and Bushbaby here.

Quote: Charley @ April 27 2008, 6:32 PM BST

You never like anything. Ever!!!

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It's a guy getting mugged...its not a joke. Wheres the hunour? ha ha...the blokes got him to open his window using the girl? Is that funny?

Might as well watch the opening of bad boys, at least you get some will and martin banter going on!

I still think its funny. Although i must admit i am incredibly biased.

It's a bit Benny Hill isn't it?

Maybe, if the man were not intimidated:

HE HANDS HER A £20 NOTE.

MAN
Can they check the tyre pressures?

Benny Hill meets The League of Gentlemen without the humor.

kjs

Quote: steven @ April 27 2008, 8:46 PM BST

I still think its funny. Although i must admit i am incredibly biased.

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I think it's funny and can visualise it

This would actually sit very well in the league of gentlemen Kjsmyling. I will send it off to the bbc. See if i can persuade them to bring it back.

There's absolutely no joke here, Steven. You're right about the canned laughter being in your head.