The Computer Thread

There doesn't seem to be a general thread (loads of oddball ones) on such a massive and important subject in this day and age, so I thought I'd start one, if only to have a rant!!

First the calm bit............

I have just purchased yet another PC printer, this time a nice sleek black Canon, which so far has been a dream, compared to my previous one, which I have just taken great delight in slinging in my wheelie bin with the greatest of force I could muster, not before delightfully ripping as much off it I could.
And the reason for my ire? A Hewlett Packed Envy 6000 printer, not purchased that many moons ago

It has been, without a doubt, the crappiest piece of equipment it has been my displeasure to own from day one..................

1/. How it spent a few minutes deciding whether it would print my work or not - click, click, whirr, click.....(silence - shall I print again?).....click, whirr....... (No. Wait).....click, click, whirr.......then it sits there defying me to send another print request, which I do, then finish up with two copies because when it does decide to f**king print, you can't then stop the heap of shit!

2/. The inks show low, even when a new cartridge is inserted - even an HP one.

3/. There are default settings that you cannot change, for e.g., 100% of my work is a jpeg, but it is set permanently on pdf, which you cannot change.

4/. It changes its mind as to where it is going to save your work, and you have no choice in the matter.

5/. And to add insult to injury, I have to register it with the company AND THEN FFS have to log in to my own printer! I know, I know delete all that, but it won't let you do that. So, the printer that I bought and should belong to me in its entirety I have to get permission to use from HP - F**k off. I bought it. It now belongs to me. You shouldn't now have any say in the matter. My son says it was mostly to do with them keeping an eye on your ink usage so they could send you reminders - well again, f**k off. I'll buy my inks where and when I want - I don't need you to tell me what to do.

And in conclusion DO NOT EVER EVEN THINK OF BUYING A HEWLETT PACKARD PRINTER

Thank you for listening, because I feel better now.

PS Yes I know, you have an HP printer, which you think is the most wonderful piece of equipment you ever bought - well, good luck to you!

I recently took early retirement

There has been positives and negatives

But it was definitely worth retiring knowing I will NEVER HAVE TO USE A STUPID FUCKING ARSE BOLLOCKING BASTARDING PRINTER EVER EVER EVER AGAIN IN MY ENTIRE LIFE

Pissing things

The IT guy at my last place is mightily fortunate I didn't ram my printer right up his arse

I don't use a printer, slung the last one out as it was just taking up valuable desk top space. I have enough trouble with laptops getting them to work. I know what you mean about the ownership thing, there is a nasty creeping habit from sellers to lease you goods instead of buying them, in IT examples are Microsoft Office, you buy it for 3 years then have to buy it again. Well when my last one ran out I said f**k that again, and found a lifetime Student edition I bought online for just a few quid more.

It said you can't ever upgrade it or get the online help, but it had everything my last one did, and I only use Word. However I thought I'd have to buy the latest version of it again when I recently got a new lap top, but it transferred over as soon as I signed into Microsoft as the new lap top demanded. Not only that but it became updated with a lot more style and insert features and has all the live online help functions it said I couldn't have. And I own it without having to keep buying it. A rare result for me.

Quote: lofthouse @ 19th May 2023, 11:53 PM

I recently took early retirement

There has been positives and negatives

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A subject for a different thread probably but I'd be interested to know what these are, as it's a huge decision to make. I wasn't thinking of it but physically the job's taking its toll now, just had a month off with a bulging disc, not something I want again.

Alf.............
Yes, I get pop-ups telling me (I think, as I find them very annoying) how Microsoft can do this, can do that if I join (?), and I say "No! F**k off Microsoft!!"
It's all MY I.T. equipment, which I paid for and therefore I OWN and I don't need your permission to use it, which is what really annoyed me about Hewlett-Packard's running of MY printer.

Incidentally, about (1) retirement - I carried on working until I was 71 and my God, it made difference to my pension and finances, as (1) you don't pay N.I. beyond 65 and (2) my State pension (not so much with the private one) went up by an enormous amount - it was certainly the best thing I ever did. Mind you I did have a lovely cushy number job.😍

And (2) my son has just had a scan for a disc bulge in his spine.

He'll be wanting some very strong pain killers then if he has one. I was prescribed 6 a day and I noticed no let up in pain until nearly 3 weeks later. Constant agony. There is no position of arm that offers any relief, accept slightly with holding it above your head, which is impossible for more than a few seconds each time.

Yes that's what I've heard, it really benefits you to keep on working but I'm not sure everyone gets the choice. ? Mine's a cushy number but still semi manual working outdoors in all weathers, although much of it is driving.

When I moved 3 years ago I found out that the printer no longer worked and I'd have to reconfigure (is that the right word?) it?

It's still sitting there taking up space.

Quote: Alfred J Kipper @ 20th May 2023, 10:41 AM

He'll be wanting some very strong pain killers then if he has one. I was prescribed 6 a day and I noticed no let up in pain until nearly 3 weeks later. Constant agony. There is no position of arm that offers any relief, accept slightly with holding it above your head, which is impossible for more than a few seconds each time.

Yes that's what I've heard, it really benefits you to keep on working but I'm not sure everyone gets the choice. ? Mine's a cushy number but still semi manual working outdoors in all weathers, although much of it is driving.

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Pain is relative of course, and he did find it uncomfortable to settle.

Not sure what you mean about " not sure everyone gets the choice. ? ", because like my situation, I was very good at my job and it certainly saved them a helluva lot of faffing about to find a replacement - I think they would have let me carry on until I dropped.

Quote: Chappers @ 20th May 2023, 11:39 AM

When I moved 3 years ago I found out that the printer no longer worked and I'd have to reconfigure (is that the right word?) it?

It's still sitting there taking up space.

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They are so cheap these days, as a lot of it is them relying on you buying their hellishly expensive inks.

If I was you, I'd take it down the bottom of the garden and beat the hell out of it with a hammer. You'll feel a lot better. 😉

Quote: Hercules Grytpype Thynne @ 20th May 2023, 11:57 AM

They are so cheap these days, as a lot of it is them relying on you buying their hellishly expensive inks.

If I was you, I'd take it down the bottom of the garden and beat the hell out of it with a hammer. You'll feel a lot better. 😉

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Or get someone else to print things for me.

Quote: Chappers @ 20th May 2023, 12:03 PM

Or get someone else to print things for me.

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No thank you..........................tightwad

Quote: Billy Bunter @ 1st September 2020, 7:24 PM

I always go down to the library to do my printing. 20p per sheet.

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Quote: Billy Bunter @ 1st September 2020, 7:24 PM

I always go down to the library to do my printing. 20p per sheet.

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Quote: Hercules Grytpype Thynne @ 1st September 2020, 9:57 PM

I used to work in the reprographic trade - that 20p copy costs about 1p to them, paper, toner and machine rental/service.

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Which costs them about 2p tops in paper and toner/ink, and which would be no good to me on a Sunday afternoon when my eBay listings finish and I have to print off buyers address labels.

Oh, and tightwad. 😁 You and Chappers could start up a company Tightwad and Son, printing off people's work cheap using the library

I bought an expensive LG TV a year ago. That also wants to 'phone home. When I first turned it on (brand new) It wanted my email and post code to set up an account. It now reminds me every day that my guarantee has run out and puts a link up to extend it.
Not only that - the apps, YouTube etc tell me they need updating and to log into my LG account.

Yes there's something creepy and invasive about this new surge of home technology products. The Chinese could be observing your every move through your TV now. And they probably pass that onto the Russians.

Quote: Alfred J Kipper @ 21st May 2023, 10:03 AM

Yes there's something creepy and invasive about this new surge of home technology products. The Chinese could be observing your every move through your TV now. And they probably pass that onto the Russians.

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In which case, I'm going to have to start wearing trousers.

Stick with the kilt, it suits you.